


Regina's Golden Halloween

by GoldsJRZGirl



Series: Gold Standard [3]
Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst and Humor, Baby Evil Queen | Regina Mills, F/M, Family, Ghosts, Halloween, Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-02
Updated: 2015-03-03
Packaged: 2018-03-10 02:46:28
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 30,998
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3273872
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GoldsJRZGirl/pseuds/GoldsJRZGirl
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A Baby Regal/Gold fic! Nightmares and a sudden accident have Regina spending Halloween with Rumple and Belle and guess who gets talked into taking her trick-or-treating? Get ready for a spooktastic crazy Halloween, dearies! AU, Rumbelle, Gold Standard universe.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Nightmares

**Author's Note:**

> Don't own, dearies, just playing with them. If I did, Rumple and Belle would be in EVERY episode

_Storybrooke, Maine_

_October 28, 2013_

_Charmings loft:_

Regina Nolan woke screaming in terror for the third night in a row. "NO! NO-O-O! Mommy, Daddy, she's coming to get me-e-e!"

The three-year-old's shrill shrieks woke both her parents up and sent them running into her little bedroom, with its lavender and white rose scheme and ruffled bedspread and canopy of lavender organdy and white pine four poster bed, just like a real princess's, which was what Regina had insisted upon when Snow and David had taken her to shop for a "big girl" bed and furniture for her new room, as David had finally gotten together with Marco and several of the dwarfs to partition the loft so he and Snow could have their room all to themselves at last.

Regina's room had a lovely round stained glass window of roses and a fairy flying over them, as well as a pretty scallop-edged bookshelves, a shelf above that with some collectible dolls, and a child-sized vanity, mirror, and little desk with a chair, as well as a dresser and a closet for her clothes. There was also an antique toybox given to them by Rumple and Belle, which held most of her toys, except for Sofia and Shadow, which she slept with every night and remained on her bed unless Regina was playing with them. A lovely purple rug with a scene from Rapunzel was upon the floor in front of the bed, making the room warm and cozy. A Disney Princess lamp was upon a shelf next to the bed, casting a rosy glow about the room.

A night light was always left on and the door open in case Regina woke during the night and needed something.

David stumbled from his warm bed, rubbing his eyes, and raced across the loft to his baby girl, followed by Snow in her lacy nightgown, trailing him like some specter from the underworld. "Regina! Daddy's here," he called, as he entered his daughter's room.

Regina was sitting bolt upright in her little bed, her dark hair straggling all over, clutching Shadow to her, shivering and crying, tears streaming down her face. "Daddy! She's comin' for me!"

Charming came over to the bed, reaching for his daughter, and as usual forgot to duck and slammed his forehead against the canopy. "Oww! Dammit!" he swore, rubbing his head and then sitting down and taking the little girl in his arms. "It's okay, sweetie. You had that dream again, didn't you?"

Regina's arms wound like a limpet about his neck, nearly throttling him. "Uh huh!" she gulped, sniffling into Charming's broad shoulder. Her terror was slowly fading as she nestled in her daddy's lap. Daddy was a prince in the land they had all come from once, and here in Storybrooke he was the mayor, and to Regina he was her hero, and could send any monster hiding under her bed fleeing with a single well-placed glare.

As David patted her back, his wife came to sit beside him, rubbing soothing circles on her daughter's back. "The same nightmare again?"

He nodded. "That's what she says, Snow."

Snow shook her dark head in dismay. "David, I don't like this. She's been dreaming about the same thing for three night straight now, ever since we saw that fake dummy in the Halloween store of the Queen of Hearts. I thought she wasn't supposed to have any memory of her former life."

The Queen of Hearts, Cora Mills, was Regina's mother back in Fairy Tale Land, before she had been exiled to Wonderland by Regina herself, back when she'd been the Evil Queen of the Enchanted Forest. According to everyone who'd known her back then, namely Rumplestiltskin, Cora had been as evil as they'd come, and had made Regina's life hell, including arranging a marriage between her and King Leopold, Snow's widowed father. Snow had known Cora for a brief time, and though the woman had never harmed her, even she admitted there was something cold and creepy about the woman.

They had since learned that Cora, as the Queen of Hearts, ruled Wonderland with an iron fist, according to Baelfire Gold, Rumple's son, who'd been her slave and page for fifteen years before escaping, and had witnessed the evil woman's countless atrocities upon anyone who displeased her in the slightest. She had tortured and beheaded over a hundred of her helpless subjects, and Bae had watched several of those executions, forced to as a member of her inner court, even though he'd been a mere fourteen-year-old. It had left scars upon the boy's soul that still occasionally tore open and bled, though that happened much less now that he was grown and married to his beloved wild swan, Emma, the savior and sheriff of Storybrooke. But Bae hated the Queen of Hearts with unabated passion, and he had vowed to make the awful enchantress pay if they ever chanced to meet again.

Which was unlikely, as Cora had never yet left Wonderland, and even if she did manage to, would have to figure out how to access this world, which was not as easy as it sounded, since it was considered a land without magic by most other realms. Still, her dreadful specter lingered, and now she haunted the dreams of her former daughter.

"Regina, can you tell me what you dreamed, honey?" asked Snow softly, stroking her child's curly hair, which fell to the middle of her back.

Regina turned around, still hugging David with one arm about his neck, and said quietly, "I dreamed the bad queen was chasin' me again, Mommy. She was comin' after me, yelling she was gonna punish me 'cause I was bad, and she had a . . . a pointed stick in her hand. I ran fast as I could, Mommy, but she was gonna get me and hurt me . . ." she started crying again, obviously terrified.

David and Snow exchanged worried glances over her head. Such terror was not normal, especially since the toddler Regina was now had never even encountered anyone like Cora, and had been protected and loved by her new parents since the day Rumple had de-aged her and she had walked out of a magical cell into Snow's arms six months ago.

"Sweetie, nobody's going to get you," Snow reassured her. "The Queen of Hearts is just a storybook character, she can't hurt you." Or at least she was in this world.

"But Mommy, she was after me!" Regina insisted. "And if . . . if she caught me . . . she was gonna rip out my heart."

David felt a chill go through him at Regina's pronouncement. This was the first time she had ever said what was going to happen if Cora caught her . . . and it was something she never should have known. In Alice in Wonderland, the Queen chopped off people's heads, but only the evil magic wielders of their land took people's hearts . . . and Cora had been the foremost practitioner of that discipline in Fairy Tale Land. She collected hearts, kept them in boxes, and used their owners for her own sick amusement. When she tired of them, she killed them by crushing their hearts. As she had done to the stableboy Daniel, who had dared to fall in love with her daughter.

"Baby, where did you get that idea?" he asked. "The Queen of Hearts chops off people's heads."

"And she takes people's hearts too, Daddy," the child insisted with an uncanny prescience. "I _know_ she does! And then . . . she kills them."

"It was just a dream, baby," Snow soothed. "She's not real and nobody's going to crush your heart or kill you. You're safe here with Mommy and Daddy."

"Forever n' ever?"

"Yes. We promise," David said, rocking her back and forth. He began to sing a lullaby in his rich tenor, until Regina fell asleep against his shoulder.

"This isn't good, David," Snow said after they had tucked their sleeping daughter back in bed and left the room, returning to their bed. "It's like she's remembering bits and pieces of her old life."

"I know. I just don't know why," her husband said, his blue eyes dark with concern.

"We should call Rumple tomorrow morning," Snow said decisively. "He was the one who erased her memories, he ought to know why she's remembering things now that she shouldn't have. I can't take this, David. She's terrified out of her mind by these nightmares."

"I know, love. But Gold should be able to fix it," David said confidently. Rumplestiltskin Gold was the most powerful sorcerer in all the realms, and if anyone could help Regina, he could.

"Okay. First thing tomorrow I'll call him and see what he says," Snow told him. Then she wrapped her arms about her husband's neck and murmured, "But right now all I want to do, love, is go to sleep."

Charming put his arm about her and she curled up with her head on his chest, falling asleep listening to his heartbeat. Within moments, he too was slumbering, and the little family slept peacefully until their alarm woke them at six o'clock the next morning.

**Page~*~*~*~*~Break**

The phone rang just as Gold was fixing his new Ferragamo tie on his shirt, preparing to go to work at his pawnshop. He quickly grabbed it, not wanting it to wake his sleeping wife, who was now almost twenty weeks pregnant with twins, and had been having trouble sleeping recently. "Hello? Snow?" he , taking the cordless phone into the hallway and shutting the bedroom door behind him. "What's the matter? You sound stressed. Regina's been having nightmares . . . of _Cora?_ For how long, dearie? Hang on a minute . . . I need to wake Alina up for school . . ." He knocked on the door of his daughter's room. "Alina, dearie, rise and shine!" he called loudly.

He heard a muffled thump, and then Alina's voice, "Okay, Papa, I'm up!"

There came the sound of a cat meowing.

Gold opened the door, and a black kitten came out, rubbing against his ankles and purring fit to wake the dead. "Okay, baby, Papa's going to feed you," he crooned to Nala. "Huh? Oh, sorry, Snow. No, I wasn't talking to Alina, I was talking to Nala. Right . . . the nightmares. No, dearie, that's not supposed to happen . . . she shouldn't have any memories of her former life . . . unless . . . sometimes with deep psychological trauma, latent memories can surface." He knelt and stroked Nala while listening to Snow. "I'm not talking about a few bad childhood memories here, Snow White . . . what we're probably dealing with is some sort of child abuse," he said darkly. "That's the only thing that would be resistant to my regression spell. And considering it's Cora, I'm not surprised, dearie. That woman was a first class bitch before she ever married Prince Henry, before she ever contracted me to teach her magic. I taught her how to spin straw into gold and a few other spells before she terminated our contract, saying she knew enough to snare her prince and she didn't need me anymore. No, I didn't teach her how to take hearts . . . she learned that on her own. I'm telling you, Snow, she was dark long before I taught her, she sought me out as a way to gain power, and once she had what she wanted, a prince of the realm, she was quick enough to wash her hands of me. It was goodbye Rumple, so long farewell, and don't let the door hit your ass on the way out of the palace. I never saw her again until the birth of her daughter, when she called me to ask if Regina had inherited her magic. I told her yes, and she laughed and said, blood will tell, eh, Rumple, then dismissed me as if I was nothing more than her page. She was a piece of work, that one."

He made his way downstairs, Nala upon his shoulder, the phone on his ear.

"Arrogant, power-hungry, with all the morals of a tiger shark, that was Cora for you. With her for a mother, I'm not surprised poor Regina has nightmares. The way to stop them, dearie, is to bring her to me. I'll need to have her stay here for a few days, so I can monitor her sleep patterns and walk her dreams again, see where these memories are coming from, and then remove them. It's a rather delicate process, so it'll take me more than a single night, but I can do it. Don't worry, she won't feel a thing. And hopefully with the removal of whatever memories are buried in her subconscious, she'll quit having nightmares about Cora. So bring her by my shop around five thirty, dearie, and I'll take her home with me, okay?"

After Snow had agreed to his request, he hung up, and then began making a pot of coffee. He shook his head sadly as he plugged the percolator in the wall, and then summoned a can of Fancy Feast for a begging Nala and opened it and put it in her dish.

As the cat ate, he refilled her water and put more dry food in her other bowl. By then the coffee was done and he poured himself a cup.

A sleepy Alina had made her way downstairs, dressed in her uniform, her backpack slung over her shoulder. Yawning, she came and hugged him good morning, then went to get out a bowl and make herself some apple cinnamon oatmeal for breakfast. "Want some, Papa?" she asked.

"No, I think I'll make myself some ham and eggs this morning," Rumple told her. "Thanks anyhow, Alina." He summoned a bowl, the carton of eggs, and some ham from the fridge.

He spelled the ham to cut itself into cubes as he scrambled up two eggs and put some toast on. He wasn't a chef like Alice, but he could cook decently, and these days found himself doing so more than usual since Belle was sick almost every morning and couldn't stand the smell of food until dinner time.

"Regina's going to be coming over here tonight," he told his daughter as he heated a sauté pan with some spray butter.

"For dinner with Snow and David?" Alina asked, putting the kettle on to boil.

"No, she's going to be staying here for a few days. She's been having nightmares and I need to dreamwalk with her and remove a few nasty memories she has of her mother Cora," Rumple told her.

"She's been dreaming of Cora?" Alina gasped. "That's terrible, Papa!"

"I know. Cora gave _me_ nightmares way back when," her father stated, pouring the eggs and ham into the pan and stirring with a silicon spatula. "Poor Regina must be scared to pieces. But I should be able to rid her of them with a few sessions."

"How do you do that, Papa?"

"Very carefully, Alina. Dreamwalking is a very difficult spell, even for a master magician like me. It's good thing Regina's a child and that she trusts me, because I'll need to go deep within her mind to find whatever memory she had buried there and remove it. And I'll probably need more than one night to do so, since it's a delicate process."

"Can I watch?" his daughter asked eagerly.

"You can, but you won't see much, since you haven't learned to travel astrally yet, dearie," Rumple replied. "That's another reason why this spell is so difficult, the caster needs to be able to walk the dreamscape safely in order to enter the subject's mind. It's tricky, but I've done it before."

"With who, Papa?"

"Bae," he answered, transferring his ham and eggs to a plate.

"You dreamwalked with Bae?"

"Yes. It was just before we went to Manhattan, he'd been having flashbacks again, and he wanted to be free of them, but didn't want conventional therapy. So I offered to dreamwalk him and help him resolve those issues. And it worked . . . but that's another thing Cora has to answer for with me," Rumple declared angrily, buttering his toast.

"I'm glad I never knew her, Papa. I think I'd turn her into a slug or something," Alina said softly, her brown eyes glinting.

"Slug's too good for her, dearie. A pile of horse dung would be better," Rumple said coldly. "Or a rug, so I could take a paddle and beat her." He took his breakfast and sat down at the table to eat it.

Alina stirred water into her oatmeal, poured some into her mug and made herself some tea, then went to sit beside her father. "I can't wait till Halloween. Henry, Grace, and I are going trick-or-treating with Hans this year."

"What are you being again?" Rumple queried as he ate.

"Uh . . . a unicorn rider, and Grace is the unicorn," Alina said. "Henry's being a spinner, you know, with Bae's old clothes you gave him, and Hans is being a zombie skateboarder."

"Sounds like fun, dearie. But before you go out, I want to cast a protection spell on all of you. Halloween's the time when the door between the living and the dead opens . . . so it can be dangerous for young magicians, as magic attracts magic," Rumple cautioned.

"Should we be worried?" Alina asked nervously.

"No. But I'm just being cautious," Rumple soothed. "Nothing will touch you once I put my protection on you." Though he was no longer the Dark One, his aura was still strong enough to give any evil spirit or ghoul pause and send then running off back to hell rather than tangle with him if they tried to harm someone under his protection.

"Okay, Papa. I'll remember," his daughter said, then she put her empty bowl and cup in the dishwasher and started to pull on her jacket.

Gold finished his coffee and put his own dishes into the dishwasher and then pulled on his overcoat before going out to warm up his Cadillac. He would drop Alina off at school before going to work. "Got your lunch?" he asked Alina upon returning to the house.

"I'm buying lunch today, Papa. Today's pizza," she reminded him, showing him her wallet with five dollars in it.

"Okay. Do I need to sign anything?"

"Nope. Our field trip's not till November," she said, then stuffed her wallet back into her sweater and went to brush her teeth before getting in the car.

**Page~*~*~*~*~Break**

"Hiya, Unca Rumple!" Regina grinned as she shoved open the door to his shop and ran inside, making the bell jingle.

Gold looked up from dusting a shelf with some knickknacks on it, smiling. "Hey, Regina. You all ready to have a sleepover at my house?"

"Yup. Daddy's bringing my bag," she said, scampering across the floor to hug him about the knees. She was dressed in a cute denim skirt set with a purple cardigan and matching knee socks and her purple light up sneakers.

Rumple knelt to hug her, saying softly, "Did your mommy or daddy tell you why you were coming to sleep over, little imp?"

"Uh huh. Mommy said you was gonna fix my nightmares of the bad Queen of Hearts," the child said seriously, kissing his cheek.

"That's right. I'm going to make it so you don't ever have a nightmare of that nasty lady ever again," the pawnbroker told her, tweaking her nose.

"You gonna magic them all away?" she queried, half-leaning on his knee.

"I am, dearie," he nodded, standing up to greet David, who had just entered the shop with a large pink duffle slung over his shoulder and Sofia, Regina's rag doll, under his arm. "Hello, David."

"Hey, Rumple. I've got all her stuff here. Her car seat's outside by your Cadillac," Charming said.

"Okay, then let's get this in there," Gold said. He stared at the bag, frowning. "She's only going to be at my house two days, not two weeks."

"You know how Snow is, Rumple. She always overpacks," Charming laughed. He followed Gold to the door, saying to Regina, "You wait here for Uncle Rumple, okay, Regina?"

"Okay, Daddy."

"We'll be right back, dearie. You can look at the toys in that box there, but don't touch anything else, all right?" Gold said, and went outside to put Regina's bag and seat inside his car.

"'Kay, Unca Rumple," the toddler said, and went to see the toys he'd indicated in the box beneath a shelf in a corner of his shop.

Rumple returned in five minutes, calling as he entered the shop again, "Regina, dearie, let's go. Auntie Belle's waiting supper on us." He glanced around for the child. "Regina? Where are you?"

He didn't see the child at first, and assumed she'd gone into his back room for a drink, since he kept iced tea and water in his mini fridge back there.

"Regina?"

"Comin'!" she called, and then he saw her, perched precariously upon a ladder he sometimes used to reach his highest shelves, her little hands reaching for a red leather ball with a blue star on it lying on the shelf next to the two voodoo dolls.

"Regina! What part of don't touch anything except the toys don't you understand!" he gasped. "Get down from there immediately!"

"Lemme get the ball first," she said, and her little hands closed over it.

As she did so, she leaned most of her weight on the shelf . . . and it fell off the brackets and knocked into the ladder she was standing on.

Regina screamed as it started to topple over . . . but a purple mist encased her, holding her securely until Rumple came and then the mist released her.

She fell into his arms, still hugging the ball to her. "Unca Rumple! You saved me!"

He frowned at her. "Young lady, you almost broke your neck! You're lucky I came in when I did. What did you think you were doing?"

"Gettin' this ball," she answered, showing him it.

"That used to be Bae's when he was a little boy," Rumple told her, recognizing it. "What happened to staying right there and looking at the toys?"

"Uh . . . I forgot," she said, unrepentant.

He snorted. "Sure you did. And I've got a bridge without trolls I can sell you. You nearly scared me to death, you little daredevil," he shook a finger at her in reproof. "Next time you climb anywhere without permission, you're going to be in serious trouble. Am I understood?"

Regina nodded. "I'll be good," she said quickly, one hand going to cover her bottom. "No spanking, Unca Rumple."

"You just remember what I said, dearie, and you won't need to worry about it," he told her firmly. He almost never resorted to that punishment, unless she acted like a royal brat or did something totally forbidden. He shifted her in his arm, she still was holding the red ball, and gestured at the broken shelf.

It repaired itself and the dolls floated back upon it.

That done, he said, "Okay, let's go home." _Before something else happens,_ he thought balefully, carrying Regina out to his car and putting her in her car seat.

"What's for dinner?" she asked as he pulled out onto the street. "I'm hungry."

"I think Auntie Belle was going to make macaroni and cheese and coconut chicken," Rumple answered, braking for a red light at the corner.

"Yum!" Regina cried. "I love that! Hurry up, Unca Rumple! Drive!" she ordered impatiently.

"Hold on, Little Miss Bossypants," he sighed. "The light's red, that means stop."

"It's green now, Unca Rumple!" she shouted. "Green means go!" She grew so excited that she threw the red leather ball she was holding . . .

. . . and it hit Rumple in the head just as he put his foot on the gas.

"Oww! What the hell?" he snapped, jerking his head, and the Cadillac lurched forward and almost hit a blue Taurus parked on the curb. "Regina! Quit throwing that ball around. We almost had an accident."

"Sorry. It slipped," she said, giving him a pleading look from her large dark eyes. "I didn't mean to."

He sighed. "I should have made you put that ball back. You're a catastrophe waiting to happen."

"Nuh-uh. I ain't a cat trophy, Unca Rumple. I is a little girl!" she stated, rolling her eyes. "Dontcha know anything?"

"Hey, don't you sass me, young lady," he snapped.

"But I'm not a cat trophy! I's a _girl_!" she insisted, her lower lip sticking out.

"You're a pain in the neck, is what you are," he muttered, thanking God when they arrived at his Victorian in one piece.

"I'm telling! Auntie Belle, Unca Rumple's calling me names!" Regina yelled.

"Why me?" Rumple groaned as he unbuckled Regina from her car seat. This was going to be a _long_ two days, he thought, grunting sharply as the toddler jumped right on his stomach as she climbed out of the car. "Regina, I'm not a doormat!"

"You was in my way," she cried, then she ran up to the front door and yelled, "Auntie Belle, I'm here!"

Belle opened the door and Regina ran into her arms. "Hi, honey! How are you?"

"I'm good. But Unca Rumple's being mean to me. He called me a cat trophy and a pain in the neck," she told her aunt.

"He called you _what?"_

"I called her a _catastrophe_ , because she hit me in the head with a ball while I was driving and almost caused an accident and before that she almost gave me a heart attack climbing up on a shelf in my shop," Rumple explained, coming up the walk with Regina's bag, the red leather ball, and Sofia.

"Oh my goodness," Belle exclaimed, her lips twitching. "Regina, why don't you go and say hi to Alina?"

"Okay! Alina! I'm home!" Regina shrilled, and ran inside.

"Anybody would think this is her house," Gold snorted. "How are you feeling, Belle?"

"Okay," she put a hand to her tummy. "I think they just woke up. They're starting to get restless."

"Hello, dearies," Rumple greeted the twins, patting his wife's belly. "Let's hope you're better behaved than your imp of a cousin there. Come on, Belle, let's get inside before Regina wrecks the place. She can do more damage in ten seconds than an entire wrecking crew in one hour."

"Oh, Rumple! She's just a little girl," Belle chuckled.

"Famous last words, dearie," he said, following her in

 

1\. Nightmares2. Once Upon a Dream3. Sticky Fingers4. Picture Perfect5. Spooks, Chills, and Thrills6. Thou Shall Not Suffer a Witch to Live7. All's Well That Ends WellNext >

 

The author would like to thank you for your continued support. Your review has been posted.


	2. Once Upon a Dream

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rumple dreamwalks into Regina's mind to discover the source of her nightmares

The two elder Golds found Regina sitting at the table watching curiously as Alina carved a pumpkin. This was the tenth pumpkin their daughter had carved to put around their front porch and walk for Halloween. Alina loved carving different things on pumpkins, Alice had taught her how long ago, when she bought the girl her first Master Pumpkin Carving set, and now it was something of a tradition for Alina to carve pumpkins representing each of her friends and family.

She had carved a book jack-o-lantern with Henry, with an open book whose pages began with the classic "Once Upon a Time", she made a Dalmatian pumpkin for Archie, a wolf howling at a full moon for Ruby and Granny, she had carved a falcon holding a katana in its talons with Bae, Emma's was a zombie hunter, Belle had carved a rose on a pumpkin, Rumple had a spinning wheel, Alice and Jeff had a hat with a Cheshire Cat coming out of it, Grace had a screaming ghost, and Snow and Charming had a spectral knight with his lady on a horse.

"This one's yours, Regina," Alina told her small "cousin". "So what do you want on it?"

"A witch!" Regina told her, grinning. "A scary witch, flying, with an apple in her hand."

"An apple?" Alina asked, an icy shiver going down her spine.

"Yup. This is a bad witch, Alina. She's got horns like Maleficent and she gives out poisoned apples like the Wicked Queen to all the children and makes them fall over dead!" the toddler declared.

"That's pretty scary, Regina," Alina said. "You sure you want that?"

"Uh huh."

"You know, when we light them up, something a little bit magical happens," Alina warned her.

"Like what?"

"You'll see . . . on Halloween," Alina said, and then she began carving.

"Do you magic 'em or does Unca Rumple?" Regina queried, leaning on the table to see what the girl was carving.

"Both of us," Alina answered. "Actually, we don't magic the pumpkins, it's the candles."

"An' then you need to make a cat pumpkin," Regina stated. "For Nala."

"Okay, scamp," Alina laughed. "Now move over, you're blocking my light."

Regina looked at the pile of pumpkin insides and seeds Alina had put on a newspaper and cried, "Pumpkin guts! Eeew!"

"You can eat the seeds, imp," said Rumple.

"We can roast them in the oven after dinner," said Belle. "They're delicious with salt."

"Can I help, Auntie Belle?"

"Yes, you can sprinkle salt on them," Belle agreed. "But first, let's set the table in the dining room. You get the napkins in the buffet drawer."

As Regina ran into the dining room to get the napkins, Rumple used a small bit of magic to separate the pumpkin seeds from the pumpkin insides and put them in a small container for later.

"I think we'd better be careful how we magic this one, Papa," Alina said as she carved the witch's hat.

"Yes, dearie. Don't want to scare the little imp too much," her father nodded.

**Page~*~*~*~Break**

After dinner, while Alina finished carving Regina's scary witch pumpkin, Belle showed Regina how to sprinkle sea salt on the pumpkin seeds she arranged on a baking sheet. The little girl eagerly sprinkled salt on the seeds . . . and also on the floor.

Belle blinked, then said teasingly, "Are you trying to make it snow in here, Regina?"

Regina stared down at the salt on the floor, her lower lip quivering. Suddenly she whimpered, "I's sorry!" and dropped the container on the floor and ran to hide under the table in the dining room.

"Regina, honey, you're not in trouble," Belle called, puzzled by the child's reaction. She carefully leaned over to get the salt, and when she straightened up, put a hand to the small of her back. It was getting more and more difficult to bend over these days as her pregnancy progressed.

"What's wrong, dearie?" Rumple asked, coming into the kitchen. "I thought I heard something fall."

"Rumple, something very . . . odd just happened with Regina," Belle said, and told him about the salt and Regina running off to hide in the dining room. "I don't understand. I didn't even yell and she . . . acted like she was in trouble."

Rumple waved a hand, and the spilled salt was cleaned up. He frowned worriedly and said, "You know, Belle, that she's been having nightmares about the Queen of Hearts. But I think . . . the problem may go a wee bit deeper than that."

"What do you mean?" his wife asked.

"I mean . . . maybe the lass isn't just having nightmares, but remembering other things as well . . . I doubt Cora would ever win Mother of the Year, and perhaps Regina's recalling other nasty things from her past too, and she doesn't even realize it," Rumple said softly.

Belle put a hand to her mouth. "Oh, Rumple, that's horrible! She's . . . acting like . . . she was abused or something."

"Belle, I don't doubt she was. Cora could be very . . . vindictive and she had the worst temper . . . which I don't doubt she took out on her daughter at times," Rumple sighed. "Regina probably doesn't recall why she felt the need to hide but I'd say she was probably punished for being clumsy and spilling things as a small child in her former life."

"Punished how?"

"Your guess is as good as mine, dearie, but I'd say it was a lot more than a mere "now look what you've done" scolding," her husband replied. Shaking his head, he went into the dining room and knelt to peer under the table. "Regina, dearie, what are you doing?"

"I's hiding," the little girl replied.

"Why, dearie?"

"'Cause I was a clumsy brat an' made a mess all over Auntie Belle's floor," the child sniffled, her dark eyes suddenly filling with tears.

"Regina, that was an accident," Belle said, coming to stand near her husband. "You're not in trouble."

"I'm . . . not?" Regina repeated, sniffling some more.

"Why would you think so?" Rumple asked, curious to see what she answered.

"'Cause . . . I spilled soup once on the floor an' the mean lady . . . she . . . she . . ." here the child faltered and stuttered.

"Tell me," Rumple urged. "Did the mean lady yell at you? Did she spank you?"

"Uh huh. She screamed I was a clumsy brat an' she spanked me with her shoe," Regina whimpered. "I's sorry, Unca Rumple! No spankings . . . please!"

"Regina, no one's going to spank you," the pawnbroker reassured her. "You're not in trouble, dearie. Not over an accident. All the salt's cleaned up."

"Regina, I promise I'm not angry at you for spilling the salt," Belle added. "Come out, please. I'm going to put the pumpkin seeds in the oven and you can watch them bake."

"I can?"

"You sure can," Belle urged. "Come out, baby."

Regina considered. After a few long moments, she crawled out from under the table and ran up to Belle and hugged her. Then she went and hugged Rumple. "I'm not bad for spillin' salt?"

"Only if you did it on purpose," he told her. "But since you didn't, you've got nothing to worry about, dearie." He patted her back gently.

She gave him her signature smirk then and raced into the kitchen, calling, "Auntie Belle, are they in the oven?"

"Just a minute, and they will be," Belle chuckled. "Good heavens! I can't walk all that fast anymore with these two inside me."

"Take your time, dearie. Miss Bossypants can wait," Rumple said, rising to his feet. He followed his wife as Belle waddled into the kitchen and put the cookie sheet of pumpkin seeds into the oven to roast.

Regina dragged a little stepstool over in front of the oven and climbed on it to look in the window and see the seeds roasting.

Belle set a hand on her shoulder and said, "Careful, Regina. Just look, but don't touch. You could get burned since the oven is hot."

"Okay, Auntie Belle," the toddler said. She continued to peer through the door. "When are they done?"

"I set a timer for fifteen minutes," Belle said. "When it rings, they're done."

"Oh." Regina said.

For a few more minutes, she was content to watch the seeds, but being Regina, she couldn't sit still for very long, and soon she had climbed down from the stool and wandered into the den, where she spotted Nala peacefully sleeping in Rumple's work basket, which contained a little sweater he'd been knitting for one of the twins, and some extra yarn and his knitting needles.

"Hiya, Nala!" the little imp exclaimed and rushed over to pet the cat.

Nala woke up as if electrocuted, saw Regina heading towards her, and leaped out of the basket.

"Nala! C'mere!" Regina called, and threw herself at the black kitten, trying to grab her.

Nala bolted behind the sofa, and Regina shrieked, "No! I said c'mere!" and went to run after her.

But her sneaker got tangled in Rumple's yarn, and she dragged it along with her as she tried to get the cat behind the sofa.

Nala darted out from behind the sofa and behind a recliner.

Regina followed, the tangled yarn coming right behind her.

She chased the cat all about the room, and in about five minutes had herself hopelessly tangled up in Rumple's yarn. She stamped her foot, trying to get rid of the yarn, but it was impossible.

"What's going on in here?" Rumple demanded, then he froze as he saw the state of his formerly neat den. "Oh . . . my . . . God!"

Regina stood beside an end table, her feet trapped in yarn wound about her sneakers and ankles.

Yarn was all over, tangled about every piece of furniture in the place, and his lovely Arran sweater was all unraveled as Regina had managed to pull it off the needles and undo all the rows as she raced after Nala, who was now perched upon the coffee table, looking alarmed. It looked like a crazy giant had been playing cat's cradle with all the yarn in Rumple's workbasket, winding it all over.

"Rumple, what's wrong?" Belle asked, coming to see why he sounded so shocked. "Oh . . . good heavens!"

"Mama, what's the matter?" Alina asked, she had finished carving the pumpkin and now went to see what was going on. "Wow! Regina, what on earth did you _do_?"

"I was trying to pet Nala, Alina, and now I'm stuck!" Regina wailed, trying unsuccessfully to pull herself free of the yarn.

But all she succeeded in doing was pulling her foot out of her sneaker, overbalancing, and sitting down on the carpet. She glared at the yarn surrounding her and yelled, "Unca Rumple! Look what Nala's done!"

Rumple goggled. "Look what _Nala's_ done?" he repeated.

"Uh huh. She made me chase her and now I'm all tangled up," the little girl said grumpily, crossing her arms.

Alina started giggling.

"Alina Rose, it's not funny!" Rumple scolded. "Look at the . . . disaster she's made out of my yarn. Not to mention my den!"

"Sorry, Papa. But . . . she does look kinda cute like that," his daughter said, trying vainly to stifle her snickers behind her hand.

"Uh huh. Cute as a vampire bunny," snorted Rumple.

Just then the timer shrilled and Belle said, "I'd better get the pumpkin seeds out before they burn."

"I'll help, Mama," said Alina quickly.

"Just remember, Rumple, she's only a little girl," Belle reminded him before she turned to go back into the kitchen.

Rumple rolled his eyes. "Sure she is. A little bundle of trouble." He picked his way across the floor and gestured, freeing Regina from her tangled web. "Regina Nolan, why were you playing with my yarn?" he asked as he bent to pick her up.

"I wasn't, Unca Rumple," she protested. "I was tryin' to pet Nala an' she runned from me." She shook her finger at the cat, who was sitting on the table. "Youze a bad kitty!"

Rumple groaned. "My cat is not bad, Regina. Now why were you touching my yarn?"

"I wasn't!" she insisted. "It just . . . followed me."

"Well, next time it follows you, imp, stop and call someone," he remonstrated, not really up to punishing her after what had happened with the salt. And she hadn't exactly been trying to wreck his den.

He snapped his fingers and all the yarn was untangled and put back in the basket, and most of his sweater was repaired as well.

Regina clapped her hands. "All better!"

"You're lucky I have magic," muttered her uncle, then he carried her into the kitchen and sat down at the table.

They all ate the delicious pumpkin seeds and drank apple cider. Afterwards, they went into the den to see what Halloween special was on that night.

It was Charlie Brown in _It's the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown_.

"I love this one!" Alina cheered and she sat next to Belle, who sat next to Rumple, who ended up with Regina in his lap.

"'Cause if there's a scary monster, Unca Rumple'll protect me," Regina declared.

"Yup. He's good at that," Alina agreed, and turned up the volume on the remote.

They all had a great time watching the old Peanuts classic, and after the credits came on, Rumple said, "I think it's time for all good little girls to be in bed."

Regina, who'd been about to protest going to bed, halted upon hearing Rumple's speech. She really didn't want to go to sleep, but she also didn't want her uncle or aunt to think she wasn't a good girl. "Aww, Unca Rumple! Five more minutes? Ple-ease?" she gave him her best adorably-cute-and-sassy smile.

"You're a little conniver, dearie," Rumple said, tweaking her button nose. Even he, centuries old sorcerer that he was, wasn't immune to _that_ impish grin.

"Please, Unca Rumple?"

"All right. But first you get in pajamas, brush your teeth, and go potty."

"Okay," she agreed, and jumped off his lap.

"Do you need help?" Alina asked.

"No. I's big, I can do it all myself!" the child said proudly, and then she went upstairs to the little pink room that was hers when she stayed over, and opened her duffel to get out her pajamas and do as Rumple had said, for once.

**Page~*~*~*~*~Break**

Five minutes later, after Alina had read her a story about a very hungry caterpillar, Regina was carried upstairs by Rumple and tucked into her bed. The little girl immediately whimpered, "Unca Rumple, I don't wanna sleep!" and clutched his hand for dear life.

Rumple sat on the chair he'd brought up for this occasion, and said quietly, "Dearie, you don't need to be afraid. Remember why you're here? I'm going to make all those nightmares go away."

"How?" she asked, her eyes huge in her small face.

"By watching over you and using my magic to make that nasty queen run away with her tail on fire," he told her seriously.

Regina giggled at that. Then she said, "Do I hafta be asleep for it to work?"

"You do. But I promise that when you go to sleep, I'll be right here . . . and with you in your dreams," he said.

That might have seemed totally odd if he said that to another child, but Regina had grown used to her family doing odd things, so Rumple being in two places at once wasn't puzzling to her—as a magician he could do pretty much anything, according to her logic.

She sighed and whispered, "Okay . . . but I'm scared . . ."

"How about if we play a little game so you're not scared?" he suggested.

"What kinda game?"

"I want you to close your eyes and count to five . . . and while you're counting imagine sheep jumping over a fence, dearie," he instructed. "Ready? I'll do it with you. One . . . two . . . three . . . four . . . five . . . I counted five sheep alive . . . six . . . seven . . . eight . . . nine . . . ten . . . now let's start again . . ."

Despite herself, Regina found herself slowly drifting off, her hand holding Rumple's, listening to his soft soothing voice, and counting with him aloud. By the time they had counted to thirty, Regina had fallen asleep, her breathing deep and even, her lashes a coal black smear against her porcelain cheeks.

Rumple smiled tenderly down at her, then rapidly sketched a circle of protection about them with his magical chalk. After that he sat down and made himself comfortable, then put himself into a deep trance state, something only a master magician knew how to achieve, and traveled astrally into the dreamscape.

**Page~*~*~*~*~Break**

Some would say the dreamscape was filled with fire, others with ice, but Rumple knew the dreamscape appeared the way the dreamer thought it should, and therefore it was different every time one entered it. Since this was Regina's dreamscape, he emerged into a world that looked remarkably like a palace, with rich tapestries and lots of mirrors, thick carpets, velvet drapes, and soft music playing. He almost expected to see noble ladies and gentlemen dancing.

He drifted through the palace setting, almost like a ghost, though he knew that here he could be injured and some of that injury could be psychosomatically transferred back to his body . . . if he allowed the dreamscape to affect him to such an extent. But the trick was to believe, but only up to a point, and to allow himself to act upon what he saw, but not permit those within the dreamscape to act upon him. The moment he allowed the dreamscape to become "real" to him, was when he became capable of being injured by it, and in rare cases, even dying from it.

But he knew how to avoid those pitfalls, having traveled it before, with Bae, and so he walked through the lovely palace, his head cocked slightly. Then he heard it . . . a child pleading and crying.

He concentrated and suddenly he was standing before a door, which stood partially open, and inside was Cora, just as he recalled her from his own memories, dark hair piled atop her head, wearing a rather provocative red dress with gold edging along the bodice and sleeves, with a golden girdle cinching her waist. She wore dainty kidskin slippers and a large ruby pendant around her neck.

Rumple didn't recall the pendant, and figured it might have been something she acquired after she'd married Henry, perhaps some sort of state jewel. She was seated on a chair, and beside her was Regina, in her pink ruffled nightgown, huddled in a chair, shaking as Cora smiled down at her, and said in a tone of honeyed poison, "Regina, darling, now I want you to watch carefully while Mommy shows you something important . . . something you'll need to know in order to keep your subjects in line . . ." She reached into a familiar wooden box and withdrew a glowing heart, beating in her palm. "Do you know what this is?"

Regina nodded, shivering. "It's . . . a heart."

"Very good, darling! A heart, indeed," Cora purred. Then she spoke into it, summoning the one whom it belonged to.

Rumple watched in disgust as she showed the little girl how to control the heart's owner—in this case a small serving girl, making her say and do whatever Cora wished.

"Hearts give you power, Regina. And power is how you remain strong, understand? Power is everything! Without power, without magic, you are nothing! Say it!" she growled, and she grabbed Regina's arm hard.

The little girl cried out, "Oww! Mommy, you're hurting me!"

Cora gripped tighter. "I'll hurt you worse if you disobey me! Now say it!"

Sobbing, Regina repeated what her mother had said.

"Again! And quit sniveling! Princesses don't cry like stupid babies!"

Cora made the child repeat the horrid saying at least five times before she was satisfied and then she held the heart out to her daughter. "Now . . . take the heart and squeeze it. Squeeze hard."

"Why Mommy?"

"Do it!"

Regina took the heart, disgust plain on her face and squeezed it.

The little serving maid screamed and fell to the ground, holding her chest.

"Good! You see! You have ultimate power, my daughter. Now . . . crush it!"

"No! No! I don't wanna hurt her!"

Cora's hand flashed out, like a viper striking, smacking Regina across the face. "Don't you dare tell me no! Do it! Now! Or no supper and you'll be locked in the closet again!"

Regina started to cry. "Please, Mommy! I sorry!"

"Do it, you little whimpering milksop! Crush the heart!"

Regina gulped . . . and then she flung the heart down and bolted from the room.

Her small form ran right past shadowy Rumple and down the corridor, desperate to escape the evil hag she called her mother.

Cora charged after her, now holding a switch in her hand. "Come back here, you wretched brat! When I get a hold of you, Regina, you'll regret it!"

Regina glanced back and tried to run faster, but for some reason her feet seemed to go nowhere, and Cora advanced, her face a mask of fury.

Regina screamed, desperate now.

It was then that Rumple intervened, stepping from the shadows and into the path of the angry Queen of Hearts. "Stop!"

Cora drew up, her face sneering and cold. "Who are you to dare interfere with me?"

"This child is under my protection, and you shall not harm her while I draw breath," Rumple declared firmly.

Cora laughed. "Then you shall shortly breathe no more!" She lunged at him, her hand extended, clearly prepared to thrust it into his chest and withdraw his heart.

"No! Mommy! No!" Regina screamed.

Rumple gestured and Cora was blown backwards off her feet to land in a heap against the wall. "Never threaten, dearie, unless you can follow through," he said icily, and he gestured again and Cora became a tiny shrew, who fled when he stamped his foot at her.

He turned slowly and looked at Regina. "Regina, it's all right. You're safe with me, dearie. Don't you remember me?"

The child stared up at him, her eyes wide with awe. Then slowly, recognition replaced the starstruck gaze and she cried, "Unca Rumple! You came for me!"

"Didn't I promise I would?" he said, and then he held out his arms.

Regina jumped into them.

He held her close. "Now, dearie, listen to me," he murmured, placing a kiss upon her forehead. "You're going to forget you ever remembered this. It never happened, sweetheart. Forget . . . for now and forever."

His magic washed over her then, a soothing purple wave that removed the horrible memory and replaced it with one of her and Snow having a tea party together.

The palace crumbled about them, and the dreamscape shook as it was altered as Regina's mind accepted the new "memory" and then Rumple was standing with her in a meadow, amid spring sunshine and flowers.

There was a checked picnic blanket upon the grass with a small tea set upon it, and Snow sat among the thick green grass, and smiled as she saw Regina and Rumple.

"Mommy! C'mon, Unca Rumple!" Regina cried, and he set her down.

She took his hand and led him towards Snow, and he allowed her to do so, sensing that exorcising that evil memory was about all she could handle for one night. There were more pockets of unrest and terror within her subconscious, but for tonight, it was enough that he had rid her of one demon.

As he sat down with Regina and Snow, he closed his eyes and willed himself back into his body and out of the dreamscape.

**Page~*~*~*~*~*~Break**

Rumple yawned and rubbed his eyes before he opened them, awake once more and back in his house, sitting next to Regina's bed with her hand still clasped in his.

He gently tried to remove his hand from hers without waking her, but that proved to be almost impossible.

As he pried her fingers off, she stirred and woke. "Mmmhmm . . . Unca Rumple?"

"Yes, dearie? Go back to sleep."

She blinked sleepily at him. "I had a bad dream . . . but then you was there and the nasty queen was blown away . . . like a bad fart."

Rumple's lips quivered at the image _that_ comment brought to mind. "Umm . . . I told you I'd always protect you, Regina. Now close your eyes, sweetheart, and go back to sleep."

He bent and kissed her forehead. "Goodnight, sleep tight, and don't let the bad fairies bite," he recited the same rhyme he always did when he tucked in Alina.

"Night, Unca Rumple," Regina muttered, and soon her eyes had closed and she slept again.

Rumple stayed with her for almost ten minutes, making sure she was asleep without any more dreams before he canceled the protective spell and tiptoed from the room.

He smirked slightly as he did so, thinking, _Ding dong, the wicked witch is dead._

At least for tonight. Tomorrow he would travel deeper into her subconscious and see what else was tormenting her. It made him furious that she had endured such horrors at the hands of one who was supposed to protect and love her. Even at his worst as the Dark One, he had never harmed Baelfire that way, would have thrown himself off a cliff before hurting his son like Cora had hurt Regina.

But now at least he knew part of why she had such terrible nightmares. He resolved to tell Snow what he'd learned tonight, and also about the salt incident, explaining that Regina would need lots of reassurance and affection from Snow especially in the days to come. He also understood better why she instinctively gravitated towards male authority figures . . . because her father had probably been the only person who was nice to her. And perhaps the only person she felt safe from Cora with.

It would explain why she considered David and himself heroes. It would also explain why she seemed so needy and clingy at times to Snow . . . she was seeking the approval she'd never gotten from Cora.

Yawning again, Rumple made his way to his bedroom, to scribble some notes about the dreamwalk into his journal before getting undressed and crawling into bed. Usually he escorted Belle up the stairs, but tonight he was so tired he barely placed his head on the pillow before he was snoozing.

Belle tucked Alina into bed herself that night, and found Rumple curled up on the right side, sleeping like the dead, when she returned to their bedroom.

Smiling, she undressed and came to lie beside him. These days she often found it hard to get into a comfortable position to sleep due to her belly, but tonight she curled up right next to Rumple and found a spot that was perfect. Then she too fell asleep.

**Page~*~*~*~*~Break**

Rumple woke at seven the next morning, just in time to make sure Alina was up and dressed for school. Today it was Emma's turn to drive her and Henry in to Storybrooke Elementary, and she arrived promptly at seven thirty, beeping the horn in Gold's driveway.

Gold hugged his daughter and told her to have a good day at school, and waved at Emma from the porch before hurrying back inside, as it was chilly out.

The nip in the air made him long for a fire in the fireplace, so he laid some logs down and started one with his magic. Then he went to the kitchen to make some coffee. He was just drinking the first cup when he heard the toilet flush.

"Who else is up?" he wondered, and expected to see Belle come downstairs.

Instead he heard Regina's little voice saying, "Uh oh! Unca Rumple! Help!"

"God, now what?" he grumbled and started up the stairs. "Regina, what's the matter?"

He arrived at the top of the stairs just as Regina ran out of the bathroom down the hall.

"Unca Rumple . . . water's comin' outta the potty," she announced . . . just as water overflowed into the hallway.


	3. Sticky Fingers

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> More Halloween hijinks with baby Regal and Mr. Gold

"Regina!" Gold cried, staring at the growing puddle in dismay. "What did you flush down the toilet, young lady?"

Regina looked up at him guiltily. "Umm . . ."

Rumple could tell she was preparing to tell a fib to him and he put his hands on his hips and said sternly, "Now don't you lie to me, little girl. Tell the truth—what did you flush?"

"Umm . . . well . . ." the child began, looking even guiltier. "It was two things."

"Two things!" Gold growled, and then noticed the water was creeping down near his slippers. "Okay, you stay right there and don't move and I'm going to fix this flood you just made. Right there, Miss Nolan, clear?" He pointed to a spot against the wall opposite the spreading water.

"'Kay, Unca Rumple," she said and went and pressed herself against the wall, careful to keep her toes from touching the soaking wet carpet.

Rumple rolled up his sleeves, thinking he should have known this might happen sooner or later, since toddlers seemed to have a penchant for flushing anything and everything down the toilet. Alina had flushed an expensive pen of his once, and he'd had an unholy mess to clean up then, because he'd had no magic to help him.

He gestured and the water stopped flowing all over. Another quick flick of his wrists and the soaking wet floor and carpet were dried. Now that the flood was stopped, he could go and fix the toilet itself. As he walked over to it, he called to Regina, "What did you flush down there, you little scamp?"

"Uh . . . well . . . after I went potty I was bored, so I 'cided to play with Ariel an' Ursula an' Cap'n Hook an' Ariel's mermaid sisters. I was playin' kidnap, an' Hook n' Ursula kidnapped Ariel an' her sisters an' was takin' them away across the ocean. But then . . . I had a big ole storm come with a whirlpool an' I flushed Ursula an' bad Cap'n Hook down the potty!" Regina recited.

"Great!" Rumple muttered. "She flushes the sea witch and that bloody pirate down my toilet."

Now he could see Ariel and her mermaid sisters all over the floor beside the toilet, they were about the size of his hand and still sopping wet. Grimacing, he gestured and they were cleaned and dried. Then he muttered a charm and Hook and Ursula were yanked out of the pipe and he cleaned and dried them as well, fixing the toilet.

Gathering up the toys, he stuck them in the pocket of his Christian Dior bathrobe and stomped back out to where Regina was waiting. Wearing a rather stern Look, he beckoned to her. "Come with me."

Regina, sensing she was in trouble, followed reluctantly at his heels.

Rumple brought her back into her room and sat on the chair where he'd dreamwalked her last night. "Over here, you naughty little imp."

Regina walked over to him, her lower lip sticking out in a classic pout. "Unca Rumple . . . it was an accident."

He raised an eyebrow. "An accident? Oh no, that won't work with me this time. You know better than to play around with the potty. Your papa's told me he already went through that with you at home . . . more than once. Right, dearie?"

Regina bit her lip. "Uh . . . yeah . . ."

"Then what happened wasn't an accident, little imp. Now was it?"

She shook her head, knowing better than to try and lie to him. _That_ would only earn her a spanking and time out, the same as it would if she lied to her parents or Emma and Bae. "No . . . but I was playing," she said, hoping somehow to get out of being punished.

"And are you supposed to be playing in the bathroom?" he queried sharply.

"Umm . . . no . . . but Unca Rumple . . ." she whined.

"Don't you Uncle Rumple me," he scolded. "Where _should_ you be playing, Regina?"

"Uh . . . in here or . . . or downstairs," she said. Then she added, "I sorry."

"Good. You should be," he said.

She breathed a soft sigh, thinking maybe she wasn't in trouble.

Until he said, "However, you're still in trouble." He pointed to the corner across from him. "Five minutes, young lady, and I want you to think about what you did and never do this again."

Her lower lip trembled and she sniveled, "Aww, but Unca Rumple . . .!"

" _Now_ , Regina. Or shall I count to three?"

"No!" she yelped and scurried over to the corner. "No counting!" Putting her nose to the wall she stood there.

Rumple timed her with his watch, and leaned back in his chair.

Regina fidgeted and squirmed after about two minutes, shifting from one foot to the other and whining, "Can I come out now, Unca Rumple?"

"No. Now quit jumping about like you've got ants in your pants and stand still," he replied, checking his watch.

The little imp tried . . for about fifteen seconds, he'd give her that. But soon she was shuffling her feet and sniffling.

Rumple ignored her, calmly counting down the minutes.

Then she started crying, hoping to get him to take pity on her.

Familiar with that tactic, Rumple crossed his arms over his chest and said, "Quit the waterworks, dearie. Two more minutes."

"No-o-o!" she wailed. "Unca _Rumple_!"

"If you don't like it, dearie, don'tg _e_ t in trouble," he told her.

Finally it was over and he called her over to him. "Next time behave, okay?"

"Uh huh," she sniffled. "You mad at me?"

"No, dearie. Not now," he said and picked her up and hugged her. Then he dried her tears with his handkerchief and said, "Let's go and eat some breakfast."

"Okay. I want panny cakes. With smiley faces on 'em," she told him.

"All right. I think I can manage that. And how about some scrambled eggs too?"

"Yup. With ketchup."

Rumple made cinnamon pancakes with light syrup and scrambled two eggs for them. Ten minutes later they were sitting at the table eating, Regina had milk in her sippy cup and Rumple had coffee.

Regina ate happily, informing her uncle whenever she ate part of the pancake face. "I's done, Unca Rumple!" she sang out.

"Good job. Now eat your eggs, dearie."

Regina dipped her eggs in the ketchup on her plate and put some in her mouth, growling, "Rrowrr! I'm a vampire! I vant to suck your blood!" Ketchup coated her little mouth as she bared her "fangs" at Rumple.

"Little vampires who don't eat breakfast get tickle tortured," he threatened.

"No!" she cried. "No ticklin'!" She ate some more eggs.

When she had eaten almost everything, he washed her face with a wet cloth and told her to go play in the den with her Leap Frog while he cleaned up and fed Nala.

Afterwards he made some tea and toast for Belle and brought it up to her, knowing that was all she could eat until later on in the day, after the morning sickness passed.

**Page~*~*~*~*~Break**

Later on, Rumple went to work at his shop for half a day, since he didn't like leaving Belle alone with Regina for too long, since Regina was a handful and a half for anyone to watch, never mind someone who was pregnant with twins.

Belle spent the rest of the morning and part of the afternoon with Regina getting out some decorations and putting them around the house. One of Regina's favorite "scary" decorations was a "talking" magic mirror, which was a shiny small mirror about the size of her head that Belle hung at eye level on the wall, it looked almost like an ordinary mirror until you walked in front of it.

Being motion activated, once you peered into it, it "came alive" and a ghostly face appeared in it and screamed, "Help! Let me out! Help! It's dark in here! Let me out!" and realistic knocking sounds came from it. "I'm stuck in here! Get me out!" in a totally creepy voice.

The first time Regina encountered it, she was scared to death, but after the third time it started screaming about being locked up, she started laughing hysterically. "Lemme out!" she would scream along with the mirror, and shout, "Auntie Belle, the magic mirror man has a serious problem!"

"Yes, he sure does," Belle agreed, and then would ask the child where to put something, like the Halloween clings of various things all over the front foyer and the kitchen and in the downstairs bathroom.

Soon they had bloody footprints stalking them from the door to the kitchen, handprints along the wall, some zombies emerging from the wall of the foyer, a creepy guy coming out of the bathroom mirror and bugs crawling along the wall of the bathroom, as well as a skeleton reading the paper on the inside of the door.

"Eew! Roaches!" Regina shrieked every time she ran into the bathroom, and pretended to stomp them, then she would run out of the bathroom giggling.

Belle put cartoons on for her to watch, and when it came time for lunch, made Regina her standard peanut butter and jelly with crusts cut off. As a Halloween treat, Belle gave her some gummy worms, and when she saw them, Regina started singing a funny song they'd had on the TV. "Worms! Nobody loves me, everybody hates me, guess I'll go eat worms! Short ones, tall ones, long ones, skinny ones, icky, gushy, wriggly worms!" Then she picked up one and ate it. "Mmm! Yummy!"

Belle smiled at her. "Oh, Regina! You're so cute, you make me want to . . . eat you all up," she cried, and then she grabbed her niece and began to tickler her, making her giggle uncontrollably as she pretended to "eat" her.

After lunch Belle asked Regina if she wanted to help make cupcakes for Halloween.

"Will they have worms in them?" she asked.

"Well, not literally," Belle chuckled. "But we can put candy bones and fake skeleton hands on top of them, see?" and she showed Regina the cupcake toppers she had to decorate them with.

"Cool! I wanna eat somebody's finger!" the toddler crowed.

She helped stir the batter, and Belle taught her to count to twenty-five as she did so, and let her lick the bowl and the spoon afterwards.

While the cupcakes were baking and later on cooling before they frosted them, Belle read to her from a book of scary children's Halloween stories, making the little girl squeal in pretend fear. Then Belle played some creepy Halloween music on the TV while they frosted and decorated the cupcakes to the sounds of ghosts shrieking and chains rattling and doors slamming.

Belle allowed her to eat a cupcake, though afterwards the toddler was so wired that she ran around the house howling like a "werewoof" and jumping on all the bloody footprints and singing, "Step on a crack and you'll break your mama's back!" for fifteen minutes.

Poor Nala was so frazzled she went and ran upstairs and hid under Gold's desk, with only the tips of her whiskers peeking out.

Belle put a hand to her tummy and muttered, "Maybe that was a mistake," to her babies.

She continued unpacking more Halloween decorations, and was putting a gargoyle statue on a table in the den when she heard the front door open and Rumple call, "Belle, I'm home. Hey, Regina, what's— "

"Surprise, Unca Rumple!" Regina yelled, spraying him with a can of silly string.

Belle came to see what was going on and started snickering at the sight of her husband festooned with green silly string, all over his suit and his face, there was even some in his hair, and he looked like a victim of a seaweed attack. "Rumple!"

"Belle!" he gasped, wiping some of the string off his face.

"Gotcha!" Regina giggled, still holding the can. Then she ran across the foyer, screaming, "They're coming to take me away, hee hee haa haa!"

"Rumple, I didn't know she found that," Belle said, smirking.

"She'll find anything that causes a mess," he remarked, then he mock-growled, "C'mere, you wretched minx! I'm coming to take you away, all right!"

"No!" Regina screamed, still running away with the silly string can in her hand. She squirted more silly string at Rumple as she fled. "Ahh! The beast's after me!"

Rumple chased her all over the foyer, snarling and stomping, and threatening to crunch her bones and eat all her brains.

"Help! Help! Auntie Belle!" Regina screamed and ran to hide behind her. "He's going to get me!"

"I'll save you, Regina!" Belle cried. "This is how you tame a beast."

Then she grabbed Rumple and kissed him.

Her startled husband promptly kissed her back.

Just then, Henry and Alina came in from school.

Henry stared at the silly string all over, some of it covering his grandfather, and then at his grandparents smooching and cried, "Grandpa, get a room!"

"Henry! Auntie Belle tamed the Beast for me!" Regina shouted, then she sprayed him and Alina with silly string, laughing like an inmate from an insane asylum. "Happy Halloween!"

**Page~*~*~*~*~Break**

After cleaning up the silly string, the older kids sat down at the kitchen table to eat a cupcake and do their homework, while Regina prattled to Rumple about helping Belle make cupcakes and "dekrate" the house. "Looks like you two had an exciting day," Rumple said to his wife.

Belle stirred her tea and said, "We did, but she's like a firefly, here, there, and everywhere. I almost couldn't keep up with her."

"That's one reason I came home early," Rumple said. "You can rest now, and I'll watch her."

While the adults were talking, Regina poked Henry and asked, "Henry, when can I wear my princess costume?"

Henry looked up from writing about five things you could do with a pumpkin, and replied, "Not yet, Regina. You have to wait till Halloween."

"When's that?"

"In another two days," Alina answered.

"Aww! But I wanna wear it now!" Regina whined.

"But you don't even have it here," Alina said. "It's at your house."

Regina considered. That was true. Her costume was at home, hanging in her mom's closet. Bored, she decided to go upstairs and get Sofia and play with her, since her cousins were doing boring homework and Auntie Belle was having "grown-up" conversations with Unca Rumple.

Since they were busy, none of the older Golds noticed Regina slip off, and soon the toddler had climbed the stairs and spotted Nala walking.

"Here, kitty!" Regina called, and went to pet the cat.

But Nala fled, knowing better than to put herself within reach of the child's hands, running into Rumple's bedroom and under the bed, since the door was partially open, as he had come up there to get changed after the silly string game.

Regina raced inside, and not seeing the cat anywhere, spotted Rumple's good Ferragamo tie folded on the bed. She picked it up and slung it around her neck, calling softly, "Nala! Here, baby!" the way she had heard her uncle address the cat, figuring she could fool the kitten into thinking he was there so she would come out.

However, Nala remained safely under the bed, knowing quite well Rumple was not there.

Sighing, Regina went over and peered into Belle's vanity mirror. It was then she spied the makeup sitting all over it. "Pretty!" she cried, and climbed up on Belle's padded bench.

**Page~*~*~*~*~Break**

"I think we should have hamburgers for dinner tonight," Belle said. "We can put out all the fixing and let everyone create their own burger. I think Regina will like that."

"Sure she will, dearie. And Bae's coming over, so he can grill them, since he likes doing that," Rumple agreed. He glanced over at the table and saw that Regina suddenly wasn't in the room. "Now where did that imp go?"

Just then they heard an odd sound— _triptrap triptrap_ —and Rumple and Belle exchanged glances. "What on earth's that?" Belle asked.

Regina clomped into the room, the odd sound was made by her walking in a pair of Belle's Louie Vutton blue heels. She still had Rumple's Ferragamo about her neck, it was dusted with glitter, as was her entire face. In fact her face was . . .covered in various hues of different products.

Henry took one look at her and almost busted a gut laughing.

Alina goggled, then cried, "Regina! You look like a clown gone insane!" Then she cracked up too.

"I is not a clown!" the little girl declared indignantly. "I is goin' to work! Like Mommy an' Unca Rumple!"

" _Me_?" Rumple gasped. "I'm not a cross dresser, dearie," he objected . . . until he caught sight of his tie. "Regina! My Ferragamo! Good Lord!"

Belle should have been horrified at the wreck the child appeared, but instead she just found it hilariously funny.

Regina had painted her face with her body glitter, making it shimmer and sparkle. On top of it she had added some blush, blue and gold eyeshadow ringed her eyes, making her look like a psychedelic raccoon . . . or an Egyptian mummy with a bad eyeliner day. She had taken some lavender lipstick and rubbed it all over her lips and put a heart on one cheek. Some of the lipstick had drifted south and so it looked as if she was sort of frowning.

"Look, Auntie Belle!"

"I see it, Regina! Oh good God!" Belle said, burying her face in a dishtowel as she laughed uncontrollably.

"Unca Rumple, aren't I pretty?" she asked innocently.

"Uh . . . you look . . . very interesting, dearie," he managed to say.

"I gotta take a picture!" Henry gasped, and pulled out his iPhone and snapped one, still laughing.

"Now who told you, you could touch Auntie Belle's makeup?" Rumple asked, trying to keep from laughing.

Regina shrugged. "I was lookin' for Nala and I 'cided to play like I was goin' to work."

"I guess you can't blame her for that one, Rumple," Belle said, wiping the tears from her eyes. "I'd better go see what she did upstairs. And . . . umm . . . she needs a bath too, only I can't kneel down to give her one. Well, I could, but then you'd need a crane to get me off the floor . . ."

"Don't worry, I'll do it," Rumple said. "Come here, Regina."

She bounded over to him, and he picked her up . . . right out of Belle's shoes. "Do y'like my face all shiny an' sparkly?"

"You look very . . . glowing," he allowed. "But now we're going to take a bath and play with Ariel," he told her.

It took fifteen minutes for him to get off all the glitter and makeup, and after he had washed her hair for the third time, he scolded her softly. "Now, you owe Auntie Belle an apology for touching her things. You know you're not supposed to do that, young lady."

"Sorry, Unca Rumple," she replied, looking upset.

After getting her into a new outfit, he said, "I think a certain sticky-fingered girl needs a nap."

"No! I'm not tired!" she howled. She made as if to run out of the room, but Rumple waved a hand and the door closed before she could get to it. "NO!" she bawled, trying to open the door. "I don't wanna nap!" She threw herself at the door, punching and kicking it, and when that didn't bring results, threw herself down on the carpet, sobbing and having a total meltdown.

"Rumple! What's going on in there?" Belle called through the door.

"Nothing, dearie. Regina's having a fit because I want her to take a nap," Gold answered calmly.

"She sounds like you're torturing her," Belle said.

"No, dearie. If anything _I'm_ being tortured, listening to her," Rumple replied, wincing. "Don't worry. I'm not beating her. But she needs a nap, she's cranky."

Belle winced at the banshee shrieks coming from behind the door, then said, "I'll see you downstairs . . . if you can get her to sleep."

Rumple sighed and tapped a foot on the carpet, waiting for the little terror to take a breath and quit flipping out.

Finally, Regina realized her tantrum wasn't getting the results she'd wanted and she stopped pounding the carpet and screaming. Her face now all red and blotchy from screaming, she lifted her head and looked at Rumple.

"You about done?" he asked, frowning. "Or do you want to beat up the carpet some more, dearie? Maybe you think they didn't hear you over in China, hmm?"

Hiccupping slightly, Regina sat up. "Unca Rumple . . . I don't wanna nap!"

"All right . . . then how about you sit here with me for awhile?" he suggested, knowing her histrionics had exhausted her. He went and sat down on the bed.

Regina came and crawled into his lap then, and allowed him to wipe her face with a hastily summoned wet cloth. "M' not tired!" she repeated stubbornly.

Rumple smirked, and gently tucked her against his shoulder. He began to pat her back, rocking gently to and fro, whispering, "Hush, little imp. Now lie still and relax. We're going to pretend you're a silk worm, all snuggled up in your cocoon. . ."

Regina yawned, despite her protests she did feel rather sleepy and his hand rubbing her back was very nice . . . so nice that she laid her head down and closed her eyes, pretending to be a silkworm, and between one blink and the next fell fast asleep.

Rumple held her for a few more minutes before placing her gently on the bed and tucking her in. He thought about dreamwalking her then, but his cell rang. Answering it, he found it was David, calling to check up on his little princess, and the pawnbroker quietly went into the hall and left Regina slumbering, while he told Charming everything that had gone on since yesterday.


	4. Picture Perfect

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rumple gives Charming advice and also delves deeper into Regina's subconscious

David seemed rather ashamed when Rumple told him of the antics his little daughter had gotten up to in the almost forty-eight hours since he'd dropped her off at Gold's pawnshop. "Rumple . . . aww hell . . . I'm sorry she's been acting up for you . . . sometimes I don't know what gets into her. Is this . . . like some kind of . . . behavior thing she picked up when she was . . . err . . . back in our old realm? Or maybe it's . . . umm . . ."

"David, relax. This behavior thing she's picked up, like you say, is not from being raised a princess in a castle," Rumple reassured him. "This is how a normal overactive bossy toddler behaves. Believe me, I know. Been there and done that two times . . . and soon it'll be four once the twins are born."

"Alina and Bae were . . . were like this too?" exclaimed Charming, shocked.

"Sometimes, yes. Now granted, Bae didn't have half the things to get in trouble for back in the Enchanted Forest, but he was a little imp too. He was always touching things he was told not to . . . the amount of times I swatted his hand for that . . . sometimes I wanted to tie them behind his back . . . and once he burnt himself pretty badly touching a hot soup kettle because I wasn't fast enough to stop him . . . but at least that nasty lesson taught him to never touch anything over the fire again. You can ask him to show you the little scar on his hand sometime. And Alina was famous for hiding all over my house, she drove Alice and me insane trying to find her . . . once I lost her in the supermarket in the produce aisle and I almost had a nervous breakdown. . .She also flushed one of my forty dollar pens down the toilet, and I never got it back either. And one time she drew all over my wall with permanent marker because she was pretending she was a great artist like Michaelangelo."

"You're kidding!"

"No, dearie. My kids were no angels, though they weren't quite as vocal and demanding as Regina can be. They both got time outs and their behinds spanked, Bae more than Alina, and threw fits too when they didn't get their way. Bae banged his head on the ground so hard once during a tantrum I thought he gave himself a concussion, and Alina cried so much she made herself throw up once. I could tell you more stories about my two terrors at that age, but I don't want to scare you, dearie," Rumple laughed. "Just trust me . . .Regina'll grow out of it. Both of mine did. And remember, some of why she's acting up has to do with those repressed memories I mentioned. I haven't gotten them all, so until I do . . . I wouldn't be surprised if the little minx has a few more episodes."

"How . . . how do you deal with that, Rumple?"

"I go into a room alone and count to twenty . . . over and over until I'm sure I won't start screaming . . . and then I remind myself that I lived through this before . . . and if they cart me away to an asylum I'll leave Belle alone with no one to help her with the twins. And then I remind myself of something Alice once told me—someday I'll look back on these days and laugh my ass off, dearie. Especially when Alina starts dating. I haven't gotten Emma alone yet to share some stories about Bae the Terrible yet, but I will soon . . . and I guarantee we'll have a good old time, better than getting drunk off a bottle of Johnny Walker."

"I just wish I had some kind of reference point with Emma, but . . ." David sighed.

Gold smirked. "Don't feel bad, David. What's done is done, and there's no sense wallowing in regret. Baelfire taught me that. Besides, Regina will give you plenty of references, dearie. She's like three toddlers on amphetamines. Don't worry, your princess should be nightmare free by tomorrow night and ready to come home so you can take her trick-or-treating on Halloween."

"Oh boy. You know, Rumple . . . I almost want to ask you if you can take her around . . ." David said slyly.

"No, Nolan! That's one of the joys you get being a papa, dearie. Been there and done that," Rumple said wickedly. "But enjoy the peace and quiet now while you can. And don't forget to tell Snow what I said."

"Aww, c'mon, Gold! I'll make you a deal . . . only kidding. I'll tell her, and thanks for everything, buddy," David chuckled and then said goodbye.

Rumple hung up, then went downstairs to see if Belle needed any assistance with dinner, determined to get in an hour or two of peace and quiet himself before his darling niece woke up and started a new round of shenanigans.

**Page~*~*~*~*~Break**

Bae came over to have supper that night with his parents, showing up as soon as his last class at the dojo was over, arriving at Gold's house a few minutes before Emma did, in his new black Ford Escape.

"You finally got a car!" Alina exclaimed upon seeing it.

"Nice one too, dearie. How much did it cost?" asked Rumple, walking about it and nodding.

"Not too bad, Papa. I got a pretty good deal on it . . . since the man I bought it from agreed to knock off a few things since I traded him some kickboxing lessons for free for five months," his son answered.

After showing them all the amenities, Bae went inside to say hello to Belle and start mixing up the ground beef, herbs, and spices for his special hamburgers.

"Dad, I can light the grill," Henry offered.

Bae looked up at his son, his hands busy making patties and putting them on a plate lined with waxed paper. "No, tiger, but thanks for offering. You could catch your hair or eyebrows on fire if you're not careful, so just let me do it."

"But Dad . . . I can do it with magic," his son reminded.

Bae gave him a semi-sharp warning Look. "What'd I say, son?"

Henry sighed. "Okay, Dad."

"If you want to help, go and get all the condiments from the pantry or wherever they are," Bae told him.

"Alina, help Henry set the table," Belle ordered her daughter, sliding a pan of crispy fries into the oven. As the two went to do as she'd said, she looked over at her stepson and asked, "Is there anything else you need, Bae?"

"No, I'm good right now, Mama," he replied. "I just need to mix up my secret sauce recipe here to brush over these burgers and I'm set."

"The secret sauce recipe, Bae?" queried Emma, coming through the door just then. "What are we doing, trying to rival McDonald's here?"

"Hey, babe," he grinned at her and kissed her when she came up beside him. "My secret recipe blows theirs away, trust me." He began mixing ketchup, barbecue sauce, and some other things together in a bowl and stirring it rapidly.

"What's _in_ that?" Emma wanted to know, peering at it.

"Can't tell you. Because then I'd have to kill ya," he smirked.

"Okay, Mr. Bond," she rolled her eyes at him. "But if I keel over after I eat one, it'll be your fault."

"Uh huh. You saying I can't cook?"

"I'm saying better watch what you're mixing, Mr. Wizard. Otherwise we could all explode," she teased, then ducked his retaliatory snap with a dishtowel. "Missed!"

"Don't make me come after you, Emma," he warned, his eyes twinkling.

"Children, play nice," Gold said teasingly. "Or else no dessert."

"What, you're not going to send us to bed?" Bae queried, snickering.

"Baelfire, behave!" Gold ordered, frowning. "Before I make you stand in the corner."

"Papa, my God!" his son muttered. "What are you in the first stages of Alzheimer's?" Then he yelped as Rumple grabbed his ear and pinched it. "Oww! Okay, I'm sorry."

"Watch it, dearie," Rumple warned, then he released Bae's ear.

"Damn! That stings as bad now as I remember it did when I was seven," Bae muttered, rubbing his ear and scowling at Rumple.

"Guess you got that a lot, huh?" Emma said, grinning.

"You be quiet!" Bae ordered. "God only knows what you got into when you were a kid."

"And you'll never know. Because I'll never tell," she replied.

"Maybe I'll go ask August," her husband threatened.

"You do, Bae, and you'll be sleeping on the couch," Emma growled.

"On second thought . . . I'll have a better time imagining it," he said, giving her a sassy smirk.

After he had painted all the burgers with his secret sauce, Bae fired up the grill and began cooking the hamburgers while Rumple and Emma got out all the fixings for them and put them on plates on Gold's lazy Susan. There were fried onions, tomatoes, lettuce, pickles, hot peppers, bacon, bleu cheese, Cheddar cheese, and sautéed mushrooms. Plus ketchup, mustard, Thousand Island, mayo, and A1 steak sauce.

Belle was making a salad and toasting the buns in the oven and checking on the fries, which were seasoned with salt, pepper, garlic, and rosemary and sprinkled with olive oil.

Henry and Alina had finished setting the table and were now out playing horseshoes.

Emma came back out on the patio and observed her husband grilling and flipping burgers, eyeing his backside appreciatively, before murmuring, "Y'know, Gold, you've got a hot ass."

He smirked and flipped a burger. "Just notice that, Emma?"

She gave him a sultry smile . . . and then she pinched him.

"Hey!" he cried, and she danced out of reach . . . until he lunged and playfully whacked her behind with his spare spatula.

"That's it, buster! You're arrested for being hot and sassy," she cried, pretending to glare at him.

"You started it, Mrs. Gold," he defended. Then he pulled her into a one-armed embrace and kissed her.

Henry looked up just then and groaned. "Oh my God! Mom! Dad! My virgin eyes!"

"Have seen this before, kid," Emma chuckled, gently disengaging from her husband.

"Aww! How cute!" Alina giggled.

Her nephew rolled his eyes. "What is it with girls and PDA's? It's like a disease."

"I can't wait till you have a girlfriend," Alina snorted. "Then I'll bet you PDA her every chance you get."

"Yeah, right. I'm not falling in love till I'm like twenty or something."

"Just wait!" Alina stated, her brown eyes sparkling. "I'll bet you kiss her so much your lips will be permanently puckered like a puffer fish."

"Ugh! Gross! I'm throwing up now," Henry gagged. Then he tossed his horseshoe and made a ringer. "Ha! Distraction wins!"

Alina picked up hers and tossed it . . . and it landed right on top of his. "Talent beats tricks."

"I wanna try," Regina cried from behind them.

Both children turned. "Hey, Regina," Alina greeted her "cousin".

Henry summoned the horseshoes back to them and said, "Okay, but . . . it might be a little heavy for you." He handed her a horseshoe.

"A lucky horsie shoe!" she crowed. Then she gave a small neigh . . . and flung it at the post.

It flew through the air . . . and landed right on it.

"Yay! I won!" the toddler screeched, clapping.

"I don't believe it," Henry gaped at her. "How'd she do that?"

"Beginner's luck?" Alina speculated.

Playing horseshoes kept the little girl occupied until the food was ready.

Everyone agreed that Bae's burgers were better than McDonald's.

Regina ate hers cut into quarters, with cheese, lettuce, and ketchup on it, and fries with cheese and bacon on the side. She picked at her salad, only eating the cucumbers, until Belle said, "Better eat four bites, Regina. Or else no brownies for dessert."

"Does they got frosting?" she queried.

"Yes. Peanut butter and chocolate," Belle replied.

"Kay!" Regina said and quickly ate four bites of her salad. Then she reached for another slice of bacon on the lazy Susan, spinning it around so vigorously that some tomatoes and lettuce flew off . . . and landed right in Rumple's plate. "Bullseye!" she giggled.

"Regina!" he reproved, gesturing and the flying vegetables were put back on their plate. "You know better than to throw food."

"I didn't, Unca Rumple," she answered innocently. "It did it its own self."

"Sure, dearie. And I've seen purple unicorns," her uncle snorted.

"You has?" she gasped. "Where?"

"Never mind where. Now quit throwing food."

"I didn't!" she said mulishly and glared at him.

He glared right back at her. "You want brownies?"

"Yeah."

"Then quit sassing me, young lady. And finish your hamburger."

Pouting, she stuck out her lower lip and glared at her plate.

Rumple arched an eyebrow. "One."

She continued glaring at her remaining piece of hamburger as though it had insulted her. "You is _mean_ , Unca Rumple."

"Two."

"And nasty!"

Alina and Henry looked at each other. "She wouldn't really . . .?" Henry hissed at his best friend.

"It's Regina. She just might," Alina whispered back.

"Okay, dearie. Your choice," Rumple began. He opened his mouth.

"No!" the toddler yelped suddenly, and then bit into her hamburger, deciding that obedience was better than defiance . . . and so was getting brownies for dessert.

"If I ever have one like her, I'm shooting myself," Emma whispered to Bae.

"Don't worry, wild swan. Any daughter of ours will be perfect," Bae told her.

"Yeah. A perfect terror," Emma joked. Then she ate a second hamburger.

**Page~*~*~*~*~Break**

After dessert, they all watched The Nightmare Before Christmas and then Emma helped Regina get into her My Little Pony nightgown and brush out her hair before tucking her into bed. Then she read Splat the Cat's Halloween to her and then kissed her cheek. "Good night, baby sister."

"Night, Emma."

"Your turn, Bae," Emma said as she went out, and Baelfire came into the room and read her a second story called Spookly the Square Pumpkin, and said, "Okay, Regina," and he kissed her nose. "Sweet dreams, princess minx."

"Night, Bae."

Then Belle and Rumple came in, and Belle read her a final story, about a magical pony who could fly, and kissed her on the forehead, murmuring, "Goodnight, sleep tight, and don't let the bad fairies bite!"

Regina yawned and muttered sleepily. "Night, Auntie Belle. Where's Unca Rumple?"

"Right here, little imp," he replied, and took her hand, as he had done the previous night, holding it securely until her eyes drifted shut and she slept.

Then he drew a protective circle with his magical chalk and tranced himself into the dreamscape once again.

**Page~*~*~*~*~Break**

This time Rumple found himself in a large bedroom with a huge canopied bed covered in lush purple and black velvet, with tons of pillows upon it. Before the bed was a large vanity with a gigantic mirror. In front of it on a large round cushioned seat of purple damask was Cora, and seated next to her was Regina, on a small stool, watching as Cora applied makeup and powder to her face with small powder puffs and brushes.

"Pretty, Mommy!" Regina said, watching happily.

Cora applied eyeliner to her eyes before saying, "Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, Regina. So if you think you're the fairest one of all . . . then so will others . . . so long as you act like it. You must tolerate no rivals, my daughter. _You_ are the queen . . . and everyone else is just dirt beneath your feet. Understand?"

"Yes, Mommy," the child replied, though she clearly didn't, and was just saying that because it was expected.

Cora began pointing out the various cosmetic on her vanity and telling her daughter what they were for, saying, "All of these, Regina, enhance what's already there. Thank goodness I have good bone structure and teeth. And hair." She eyes her daughter critically. "But you . . . ah . . . you've inherited a lot of your father's features . . . and his nose and smile . . . don't go well on a girl's face, I'm afraid."

"What do you mean, Mommy?"

"I mean, Regina, that you're not perfect . . . just passable. But we can work with that. Come here," she ordered, and taking a pair of small tweezers, began to pluck the child's eyebrows ruthlessly.

Regina screamed, but was unable to move because Cora cast a spell on her to keep her immobile. "Oww! Oww! Mommy, you're hurting me! Oww!"

"Quiet! This is your first lesson. Sometimes being beautiful hurts. Now stop crying, before I give you something to cry about," Cora snarled, and continued plucking, ignoring the child's wails.

"Mommy! Please! I don't wanna be perfect!"

"Of course you do, darling. Every woman wants that, especially princesses. Now shut up! You're going to be the fairest one of all . . . once I fix what's wrong with you that is. Gods, such a pity you didn't inherit my delicate chin and cheekbones. You've got bones like a man's."

Within a few minutes, she had reduced the curious child to a sobbing wreck.

"Hellfires, woman!" Rumple snarled, coming out of the shadows. "No child is perfect . . . and you don't need to torture her for some fake ideal. Let her go!"

Cora spun around. "Who said you could come in here? Get out! Before I make you scream like a little girl."

"Go ahead, dearie. But I'll bet I can make you scream louder," Rumple sneered. His first spell freed Regina from Cora's binding.

The child scrambled off her stool and ran and hid under the bed.

Cora snarled a swear word and then threw fire at Rumple.

Who caught it and threw it back . . . right at her head.

Her hair caught on fire and she shrieked and went to beat it out . . . her perfect coif all singed and blackened. "No! My hair!" she shrieked.

"See, dearie? Told you so," Rumple taunted, giggling like a demented hyena.

Cora spat another swear word and spikes exploded from the wall and tried to impale Rumple.

But he was too quick, melting away in a gust of purple smoke and reappearing just behind her with a pair of shears . . . and he gleefully chopped all her hair off until she looked like a newly shorn sheep.

"Ahhh! What have you _done_?"

Rumple giggled delightedly. "Not so fair are we now, dearie?"

Howling in rage, a bald Cora spun around and thrust out her hands. Black lightning streaked from her fingers . . . to be repelled by Rumple's purple shield.

It flew back at her, and Cora yelped as some of it struck her, making her skin crisp and blacken. "You miserable monster! How dare you?"

"I'll dare anything once, dearie," the former Dark One sniggered. "What's that new powder you're wearing, Your Majesty? Burnt Offerings? Kind of makes you look . . . sooty. Playing chimney sweep now, are we?"

Cora charged at him then, her hands glowing with eldritch power. "I'm going to rip out your heart and crush it, you giggling lunatic!"

Rumple started giggling and dodging all about the bedroom, saying in a high singsong voice, "All about the mulberry bush . . . Medusa chased a weasel . . ." and then he began casting back at her, chuckling inanely as he did so. "Nyah nyah nyah, can't catch me, dearie!"

He jumped on the bed, somersaulted off and landed behind Cora, who tried to flatten him with a wave of icy hail.

He turned the ice into water and it splashed all over him. He gave a sharp cry and covered his face with his hands, sobbing, "I'm melting! Melting!" and sank to the ground.

Cora laughed.

Until he pulled his hands away from his face and cackled. "Haha! Made you look!"

Smirking like a clown gone crazy, he sent her flying against the wall and cast one final enchantment. "Voila, dearie! Now look in the mirror and tell me who's the fairest one of all?"

The Queen of Hearts did so . . . and screamed like a banshee.

"NO! NO! NO!"

"Something wrong, dearie?" Rumple queried solicitously. "Oh my! Bad hair day, is it? Too bad." Giving a last high-pitched snigger, he waved a hand.

Poof!

Cora melted away . . . just like the Wicked Witch of the West.

"Regina, dearie, come out. She's gone," he called gently, morphing back from his Dark One persona to Mr. Gold as he did so.

"Unca Rumple?"

Regina poked her head out from under the bed.

"See, dearie? The bad lady's nothing but a puddle of green slime," he gestured to the floor.

Smiling, she ran over to him.

Rumple picked her up and whispered, "And you're perfect just the way you are, sweetheart. Now forget. Forget, Regina." And he kissed her on the forehead, using true love's kiss combined with his powers to remove that horrible memory along with a few others connected to it from her mind, replacing it with Snow braiding her hair, dressing her for a party, and playing with her in the garden, planting seeds and getting dirt all over themselves and laughing over it.

Then Rumple slipped quietly out of the dreamscape, leaving a gleefully smirking Regina covered in dirt and laughing her head off as she squirted Snow with the garden hose.

**Page~*~*~*~*~Break**

As before, Rumple couldn't get his hand free of Regina's without her waking up. She opened her dark eyes and looked at him, saying softly, "Unca Rumple, you kicked that nasty lady's butt!"

"That's right, dearie."

"You cut her hair an' gave her snakes on her head . . . like a monster," she recalled.

"She's called Medusa, dearie, and it served her right. Now close your eyes and go to sleep. Tomorrow's Halloween and you're going to go trick or treating with Mommy and Daddy in your lovely costume," he told her gently, stroking her hair. He knew that her memory of what she had seen him do in the dreamscape would fade and she would have forgotten it by tomorrow morning.

Yawning, the toddler closed her eyes and muttered, "G'night, Unca Rumple. Love ya."

"Love you too, dearie," he replied, and waited until she was sleeping again before leaving the room.

He glanced back once at the sleeping imp, her dark hair tumbled across her brow and down onto the pillow, and wished that he had Cora there for real and had done everything to her for real that he had in the dreamscape. Sighing, he closed the light, leaving a small fuzzy magelight bobbing in the middle of the room in case she woke, thinking that at least her nightmares had been put to rest.

He made his way down the hall to his bedroom, finding Belle already there, reading, with Nala curled by her head on his pillow. "Hey, love. Good book?"

She set it down and smiled up at him. "Yes, but . . . not as good as having you here. How is she?"

"Asleep. I think I got them all," he said, undressing. "The things that Cora did . . . makes me want to scrub out my brain with bleach. And then find her and string her up to a pole and rip all her hair out with a dull pair of tweezers."

"Rumple! Was it that bad?" Belle gasped.

"Yes." Grimacing, he pulled on his pajamas and then came and lay down beside her, one hand cupping her belly. "Promise me something, Belle."

"What, Rumple?" she asked, sensing he was troubled.

"Promise me you'll never expect any of our children to be perfect."

"I promise. Was that . . . what her nightmares were about?"

"Partially. I'll tell you later." He curled up against her, with his head nestled on her shoulder. "I love you, dearie."

"I love you too," she whispered, stroking his hair.

He relaxed then. "That feels so good. Just hold me."

Belle wondered what the hell he had seen in the dreamscape to make him like this, but she didn't bother asking. He would tell her when he was ready, and right now he needed her comfort, not her questions. So she simply held him, like he asked, and between her gentle carding and Nala's purring, Rumple fell asleep . . . and dreamed of his father berating him and telling him he was a disgrace . . . until Belle came and drove the carping crow off with a broom and told him she loved him . . . just the way he was.

> In his sleep, Rumplestiltskin smiled . . . and his nightmare faded away.


	5. Sppoks, Chills, and Thrills

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Regina's parents have an unforeseen accident so guess who gets to take her trick-or-treating?

Finally Halloween had arrived, and because of the holiday, Storybrooke Elementary had only half-a-day of school. Henry was dropped off that morning by Emma on her way into the station, as it was Rumple's turn to drive him and Alina to school that day. "Got your costume, Henry?" asked Alina as she finished eating her bagel with Nutella.

"Right here," he patted the plastic bag with the "costume" inside it from Rumple, which was really Bae's old outfit from Fairy Tale Land that Rumple had given him months ago. The bag also contained some boots of his father's as well.

"Here, Henry," Gold said, handing the boy a couple other extras. "This was your papa's too. It's a shawl I made for him, and I found this old belt too."

"Cool, Grandpa!" Henry exclaimed, and took the shawl, which was a cream colored one that could be pulled up over his head if it got chilly, and the belt had a small leather wallet attached to it that held a few small coins from the Enchanted Forest. "Wow! Real money! Is it worth much?"

"Let me see," Alina said, and looked at the coins. "Uh . . . what's the exchange rate for these, Papa?"

Rumple raised an eyebrow. "No idea, dearie, as we never needed to figure that out. But . . . these are copper pennies, so I'd say they're probably worth about a quarter or something."

"I don't care. They're cool. Do you have a knife too?" Henry asked, putting the pennies back.

"A knife? You planning to stab somebody?" Gold frowned.

"Nah. I just thought that would be neat," his grandson replied.

"No knives, boy. That's asking for trouble," his grandfather shook his head.

"Aww, but Grandpa . . . if we were back in Fairy Tale Land, I'd have one, right? For protection and stuff," Henry pointed out.

"There you'd need it. Here, it's a recipe for disaster," Gold replied. Then he gestured, and a wooden replica of a small dagger along with a leather sheath appeared in his hands. "How about this instead?"

Henry took it. "It looks almost like a real one. Thanks!" He tucked the props into his bag.

"Are you all set, dearie?" Gold asked his daughter.

"Uh huh, Papa. Remember, I went over mine last night with you," Alina said. She was a unicorn rider, and for her costume wore silvery pants and a blouse of cream and gold, complete with a silvery dragonscale vest and a long cloak of metallic gold cloth. Her boots matched the vest and she also had a golden diadem with a blue beryl in it and a whorled scepter of ivory, since the riders used batons to fight with when they rode their unicorns into battle. Belle and Rumple had made her costume together.

"We're going to meet up with Grace and Hans after school and come over here so you can do that protection spell thing," Henry said, slinging his backpack over the arm of a kitchen chair and helping himself to a bagel with butter from the plate on the table.

"Yes, and you're to go over Alice's after you're finished trick-or-treating," Gold reminded, for Henry and Alina were staying over Grace's house for Halloween. "Once you're done eating, go get in the car. I'm going to check on Regina and Belle before we leave."

Henry and Alina finished eating and Gold transported himself upstairs and checked on his wife and niece, both of whom were snoozing. Nala was sleeping on Belle's tummy, curled up like some kind of weird fluffy decoration atop her large baby bump.

The sight made Gold chuckle, and he snapped a picture with his phone to show the rest of the family later. "See you soon, baby," he called to both Belle and Nala, then went back downstairs.

**Page~*~*~*~*~Break**

Snow and David were planning to come and pick up Regina around two o'clock, and Rumple had summoned her costume from their loft so Belle could dress her in it and take pictures before she went trick-or-treating. It was her first Halloween as part of their family, and Belle wanted to take plenty of cute photos to add to the family album Snow had started with their trip to Manhattan. Regina was being Snow White, which was the princess costume she had bought in Manhattan from a nice Chinese lady.

Later on that night, Rumple and Belle were hosting a little Halloween party, for their family and some friends, it was an adult only affair, and being held around ten o'clock in the evening. Gold had decorated his basement for the occasion, using his magic to make it appear like a Greek temple to the Underworld. Alice, Belle, and Jill, Grace's foster mom in Storybrooke before the curse broke, had made the Halloween appetizers and treats for the party. There would be some fun games, punch, an open bar, and of course, everyone would be in costume. And the kids would all be asleep.

Regina helped Belle put out the bowl of candy bars for the trick-or-treaters on the little table beside the door. There were also small juice boxes and little bags of Halloween pretzels and graham cracker cookies for the kids who were too little to eat candy or allergic to chocolate or dairy products. There was also a large canister of Halloween stickers and a cardboard box of children's books. The sticker you picked corresponded to a book in the box, which were discards from the public library. Belle, as the town librarian, had final say in what was done with them, and she had decided to give them out to kids as an extra treat besides candy. Each kid would get a sticker, candy, and a book when they came to the door.

The Gold children, including Regina, had Halloween treat bags. Inside them was a large bar of imported Swiss chocolate shaped like a coffin, stickers, Halloween pencils—Regina's had crayons—a light up black cat button, and a book each. Henry's had The Last Unicorn, Alina had The Witch of Blackbird Pond, and Regina had a picture book called Bats at the Library. All were former library books in good condition. They would get them before they went trick-or-treating.

The candy bowl the Gold's used was one that played a funny and slightly scary trick on people when they came to grab candy out of it. It was motion sensitive and mechanical, and Rumple and Alina had used it for years every Halloween. It was a large white plastic bowl that looked like green slime was overflowing on the sides and inside was a large green hand, like a troll's.

Belle had shown Regina what it did, and the little girl thought it hilarious. She kept sticking her hand inside and giggling her head off until Belle told her to stop, that she'd wear out the batteries and then it wouldn't work to play tricks on the kids. So Regina stopped playing with it for awhile, and instead helped Belle and Alice make sugary Halloween cookies shaped like witch's hats, cats, pumpkins, ghosts, and cauldrons. Regina had a grand time sprinkling them with different colored sprinkles.

They made a tray for the party, and another tray for the Gold children to have, and put some in bags to hand out at the different residences, like Granny's diner, Archie's office, Bae's dojo, the sheriff station, the Storybrooke animal shelter, the cannery, Marco's woodshop, the convent, Storybrooke Elementary, and of course Gold's pawnshop.

Then Alice drove Belle and Regina, in her costume, around to deliver the cookies. Everyone said how adorable she looked, and some of them gave out little treats as well. Emma gave her a candy necklace, and said, "Hey, kid, you look just like Mom in that dress."

"Thanks, Emma!" Regina smiled, and put the necklace over her head. "Yummy!"

"Yeah, you can eat it and wear it. It's a two for one deal," her sister laughed. "I loved them as a kid." She looked at Belle. "The party's at ten, right?"

"Yes. And come in costume, Emma," Belle said.

"I will. Bae's making me. And you—what are you being?"

"You'll see. Rumple's made one specially for me and the babies," Belle said.

"Because there aren't too many costumes out there designed for a mama with twins," Alice smirked.

"Are you gonna be there?" asked the sheriff.

"Of course. Jeff too, since Jill and Jack are kind enough to watch the kids for us. And wait till you see who I am," Alice chuckled.

"Oh, boy! I'm going to make sure my phone's charged," Emma said wickedly.

Alice winked at her and said, "See you later, sugar!"

"And thanks for the cookies," Emma said, eating one and then sighing in bliss.

At Granny's diner, Ruby took one look at Belle and said, "Girl, you look ready to pop."

"I know," Belle shook her head. "But I still have another eighteen weeks or so to go. I told Rumple by then all he'll need to do is stick a pin in me and I'll explode like a balloon."

"Are you still getting sick, or has that gone away?" asked Ruby curiously.

"It's better . . ." Belle allowed. Better meaning sometimes she could eat after twelve noon.

Ruby scowled. "Being pregnant sucks. And the men get off easy. I'd like to see Gold carry one of those babies."

Alice started laughing. "Ruby, that's be hilarious! Could you see him? He'd need to get out his cane again . . . oh God!"

Regina was looking at the donuts in the glass case. She went and tugged on Belle's sleeve. "Auntie Belle, I hungry."

"Ruby, can we have—" Belle began.

"Regina, you want chicken nuggets and fries?" Ruby asked her.

"Uh huh. An' apple cider an' a donut."

"Okay, baby doll. Coming right up!" Ruby turned and yelled the order to the kitchen. Then she turned around and waved the money Belle tried to hand her away. "It's on the house. Happy Halloween!"

"Thanks, Ruby," Belle smiled at her.

"Don't mention it. She's really adorable like this," Ruby smiled at Regina.

"She is . . . but she can be a terror and a half too," Alice said.

"I'm not surprised," Ruby smirked. "After all, she's still Regina . . . just one you can send to bed without supper and spank."

Regina heard, and gasped. "Ruby, I been good! I don't need no spankin'!"

"Okay, imp. You better be good for your Auntie Belle. Or else!"

"I will," Regina assured her. "I don't wanna get time out stead of trick-or-treating when Mommy comes to pick me up."

"Or a spanking from Uncle Rumple," Alice added.

" _Has_ he done that?" Ruby asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Once or twice, yes," Belle said. "But only if she's really naughty. Like Snow and David have."

Ruby eyed the toddler, who was now singing "Someday My Prince Will Come". "She must have a sore behind everyday then."

"Oh, she's not that bad," Belle said. "She can be very mischievous, but she's also pretty savvy about knowing just how far she can go . . . and she can also be very sweet and loving. She's not the Evil Queen anymore, Ruby. She's just a little girl, like every other little girl, who just wants to love and be loved in return. She loves us, and we all love her right back."

"Really?"

"Uh huh. You should spend a day with her, you'll see," Belle said, then she went to sit down at a table with Alice and Regina until their order was ready.

**Page~*~*~*~*~Break**

The little bell over Gold's door tinkled as Alice, Regina, and Belle stepped into his shop, which was the last stop after they had gone to visit Archie on their route to deliver the Halloween cookies. "Unca Rumple!" Regina cried. "Where are you?"

"Here, dearie," he called back, from standing on a ladder rearranging some vases on a shelf. He turned and saw who was there and blinked himself down. "Well, Princess Regina, don't you look stunning in that dress?" he said, and gave her a very neat bow. "Welcome my lady, to my humble shop."

Giggling, Regina took her skirt in both hands and curtseyed to him. "Mommy taught me that," she grinned, and then she ran and hugged him about the knees.

"And you do that so well," Rumple praised. "What brings you all here?"

"We come bearing gifts, Mr. G," said Alice, holding out a small plate of cookies.

"For me?" Gold smiled and took the cookies. "Thank you. I was getting kind of hungry."

"You skipped lunch again, didn't you?" Belle said knowingly.

He shrugged. "I was busy with some customers and I just forgot. But this will do fine."

"You can have the rest of my hamburger," Belle said, and handed him a brown paper bag which contained half her uneaten lunch.

"Belle, I'm fine . . ."

She gave him a warning look. "Rumple, you need to eat. Now take it."

"All right, sweetheart," he acquiesced, then he looked at Alice and said, "I try to avoid upsetting her."

Alice snorted. "Uh huh. Good excuse, Mr. G."

Rumple gestured and the sign on the door flipped over to CLOSED. Then he snapped his fingers and three folding chairs appeared and he sat down in one, unwrapping Belle's half a hamburger and fries, cupping them in his hands and heating them up with a quick charm before he started eating it.

"I helped Auntie Belle and Auntie Alice make the cookies, Unca Rumple," Regina said, jumping up to sit on his knee.

"You did a great job. I hope you saved some for Mommy and Daddy," he said as he ate.

"Uh huh. I gots theirs back at your house," the little girl said, leaning on him.

"David called me just before you came," Rumple said as he ate the fries. "He said they ought to be over around two to pick up Regina and then you can go trick-or-treating, imp."

"Yes! And get lots n' lots of candy!" Regina sang.

The three adults laughed at the child's enthusiasm. After he had finished his lunch, Rumple insisted on sharing his cookies with Alice, Belle, and Regina.

Once they had all eaten one, Belle said, "We'd better head on back home, Regina. I'll need to pack up your stuff before Mommy and Daddy come to pick you up." She kissed Rumple. "I'll see you at home, love."

"Okay, dearie. I'm coming home in about an hour," he said, eating another cookie. He hugged and kissed Regina. "In case I don't see you before you leave, happy Halloween, Regina."

Regina threw her arms about him and kissed him on the cheek. "Happy Halloween, Unca Rumple!" she sang, then she ran to take Belle's hand.

"What, don't I rate a kiss?" Alice teased.

"You want Belle to beat me up?" Rumple laughed.

"We're BFF's. Friends share," Alice said, her eyes sparkling.

"Alice! Not my husband!" Belle cried.

"Okay, Belle. Besides, Jeff would feel left out," Alice chuckled wickedly. "See you at the party, Rumple!"

Rumple waved goodbye as they left the shop.

**Page~*~*~*~*~*~Break**

Gold came home and still Mary Margaret and David hadn't come by to pick up Regina. It was past two o'clock now and Belle frowned worriedly. "I wonder where they are? It's not like them to be late without calling."

"I'm sure they're coming," her husband said. He had already cast the protective spell on Alina, Henry, Grace, and Hans before sending them off with empty pillowcases to go trick-or-treating. All the children looked amazing in their costumes, though he had to admit seeing Henry in Bae's old clothes had nearly caused him to tear up, since his grandson looked so much like his father at that age it was uncanny.

Belle had taken several pictures of all of them on her phone before they left, and Regina was still waiting for her parents to come.

"Maybe I ought to call them," Belle said, and went into the kitchen to get her phone.

Rumple followed, going to get a glass of iced tea.

A bored Regina took the treat bowl with the motion sensitive hand down off the table in the hall and put it on the ground.

Just then, Nala came into the foyer, meowing softly.

Regina smiled when she saw the black kitten and called, "Here, baby! Nala! Want some treaties?"

The kitten looked at her warily and sat down, meowing.

Regina ran and got the little bag of cat treats Gold always kept in the den on the table. Opening it, she decided to play a little trick, and began putting down treats for the cat, leaving a trail up to the Halloween bowl.

Nala went to eat them, and Regina dumped the rest of the bag into the treat bowl and then moved away, whispering, "Come and get it, Nala!" and watching in glee.

The black kitten quietly munched all the treats and then went to sniff at the bowl where the rest were.

At first the hand didn't respond, and Nala drew closer to the bowl and upon smelling the treats, went to eat what was there.

Suddenly, the hand came alive and screamed, "Trick or treat! Want some candy?"

Just then Gold came back into the foyer to see what was going on.

Right on time to see his curious kitten get her nose smacked by the green hand.

Nala jumped about two feet in the air and darted away under the sofa, hissing and growling, while the candy bowl screamed "Happy Halloween!" and Regina laughed hysterically. "Fooled ya, Nala!"

"Hey! You shouldn't be teasing my cat that way," Gold said, half-amused, because it _had_ been sort of funny.

"But Unca Rumple, it was a Halloween trick," Regina pointed out. "And Nala was funny! Like a cartoon cat! Mrreow!" Then she burst out laughing again.

"Okay, imp. You've had your little joke," Gold said, and magically emptied the treat bowl and put the rest of the cat treats in Nala's bowl. Then he filled the bowl with some candy and set it on the table before the door. He checked his watch, and muttered, "Okay, Charming. Why are you so late? It's almost three. You fall asleep or something?"

His cell vibrated inside his pocket. Rumple picked it up and answered it. "Hello? Yes, this is Mr. Gold. Who's calling?" His eyes widened as he listened to the voice on the other end. "Yes, I'm Mayor Nolan's emergency contact if his wife is unavailable. Has something happened . . .?" He paled as he heard what had happened. "A bad car accident? Where? Is he badly injured? Is Mary Margaret?"

Belle came out of the kitchen, looking worried. "Rumple, I just tried Snow and it went right to voice mail . . ." she trailed off as she saw her husband's grave look. "Rumple, what is it?"

Gold hung up, then drew Belle into the kitchen and said softly, "David and Mary Margaret were in a bad car accident. Apparently there was a deer or something running across the road and David tried to avoid hitting it and crashed into the toll bridge. He's got a concussion and so does Snow, and their car is totaled. He also has a broken foot and Snow has some damaged ribs. David's in surgery right now, that was the hospital calling, because I'm the second person on David's contact list after Snow."

"Oh my God! Will they be okay?" Belle asked, horrified. Just then the house phone rang and she answered it. "Hello? Emma? Did you just get a call from the hospital too? Yes, so did Rumple. You and Bae are going over to the hospital? Okay, I'll tell him."

Rumple looked at Belle after she had hung up. "Dearie, I'd better go over there and see how bad they are. Maybe I can help."

"You do that and I'll stay with Regina," Belle said. "Should we tell her what happened?"

"Not just yet. I don't want to upset her if I can heal them and then they can come home," Gold said. "I'll call and let you know, okay?"

"Hurry, Rumple," Belle urged, and she hugged him before he transported over to the hospital.

Regina ran into the kitchen. "Unca Rumple, I'm thirsty!"

"Sweetie, Uncle Rumple's not here right now. What would you like?" asked Belle.

"Umm . . . some juice," the little girl said.

Belle filled up her sippy cup and gave it to her.

As Regina drank, the doorbell rang and Belle went to answer it, Regina following.

**Page~*~*~*~Break**

Ten trick-or-treaters had come and gone, taking away candy, stickers, and a book each before Belle's cell rang and she picked it up. "Rumple! How are they? Oh, no! How long will they be there? Maybe until tomorrow? What about your healing spells . . . oh, I see . . . yes, head wounds can be tricky . . . and of course you did your best . . . you're coming home now? Should I tell Regina? Okay, I'll wait for you to come home. She's been busy helping me hand out candy, but I know she wants to go trick-or-treating herself . . . see you soon, and hopefully they'll be able to come home tomorrow morning . . ."

Belle tucked her cell back in a pocket of her maternity blouse, thinking sadly that poor Regina had been looking forward to going trick-or-treating with her parents and now Mary Margaret and David were stuck in the hospital, recovering from bad concussions, and though Rumple had used healing magic on them, head wounds took time to mend, and they would be staying there overnight at least . . . as they still hadn't awakened from their medically induced comas.

Belle forced a smile on her face as the doorbell rang again and Regina yelled, "Auntie Belle, some more trick-or-treaters is here!"

**Page~*~*~*~*~Break**

Rumple came home and Belle had called Alice to tell her about Mary Margaret and David. "She said she would tell Alina and Henry to call us when they got back to her house, so we could tell them what happened. Did Dr. Whale say whether or not they'd be waking up tomorrow?"

"Victor told me he thinks they should make a full recovery, especially with my magic making sure they didn't have any bleeds or major trauma on the brain. But he says they need time to heal and the best way to do that is to sleep, so he's given them some medicine to keep them asleep till tomorrow and then he'll have them run another CAT scan and MRI of their brains to see how they're doing. But for now, dearie, we just have to be patient. Bae and Emma are there, because Emma's a wreck, she almost overspent her powers trying to bring them around, luckily I got there in time to prevent that, because she wasn't listening to Bae and refused to quit trying to wake them up."

"Could she have done that, Rumple?" Belle asked.

"Maybe. But it wouldn't have been good for that to happen. Victor said so quite emphatically. So now Emma's just sitting there waiting, and Bae's with her. There's nothing anyone can do now except wait," Rumple sighed. "And now I need to tell Regina."

He went into the foyer where the little girl was waiting next to the door and said, "Regina, I need to talk to you for a minute."

"Unca Rumple!" she cried, running to him. "Daddy's late an' I wanna go trick-or-treating."

"Yes, I know. But first I have to tell you something, dearie," Rumple said, taking her hand and leading her into the den. He sat on the couch and picked her up, cuddling her on his lap. "Regina, the reason why your daddy's late picking you up is because he got into a bad car accident with your mommy. They're in the hospital . . ." he told the child as gently and simply as he could what had occurred.

Regina listened, trying hard to understand what her uncle was telling her. "Mommy an' Daddy are hurt? They're sleepin' in the hospital?"

"Yes, dearie. But they're going to be all right. Dr. Whale promised me that they just need to rest and soon they'll be home again. Emma's there now. Would you . . . like to see them?" he asked.

"Umm . . . can they wake up?"

"No. Not yet."

"They're just sleeping, Unca Rumple?"

"Yes."

"Can I see them tomorrow?"

"You can. Now . . . would you like to go trick-or-treating for a little bit? I'll take you around the block here and maybe a few streets over too before it gets very dark," Rumple offered.

"Okay!" Regina said, her face losing its pensive expression. "Lemme get my pumpkin bag!" She ran over to where Belle had put her pumpkin bag and grabbed it up. "Auntie Belle, Unca Rumple's gonna take me trick-or-treating 'cause Mommy an' Daddy are hurt an' sleepin' in the hospital."

Belle knelt and hugged her. "I know, sweetie. Have a good time, okay?" She smiled up gratefully at her husband. "I know this isn't how you wanted to spend your Halloween, Rumple . . ."

"Hey, if something happened to us, David and Snow would do the same thing for us. Besides, we won't be gone long . . . only about two hours and then I'll be back to help you set up for the party and give Regina some supper and put her to bed."

"Unca Rumple! I is ready!" the child yelled, practically gyrating before the door.

"Okay, I'm coming," he grabbed Regina's jacket in case she got cold and then walked out the door into the autumn afternoon, Regina tugging his hand excitedly. Gold just hoped she'd be tired out when he got home.

**Page~*~*~*~*~Break**

The first few houses they went to along Gold's street, which was called Threadneedle Way, Regina ran up the walk holding Gold's hand and ringing the doorbell. "Trick-or-treat!" Regina warbled, holding out her bag.

"What an adorable costume!" said Gold's neighbors, hiding smirks at how the former mayor had the richest man in town chauffeuring her around on Halloween.

"I'm Snow White!" Regina declared proudly, making several of them giggle at that pronouncement, though she didn't understand why.

By the time they had gone around the block, which was a small cul-de-sac, Regina was wired and practically dragging Gold down the street, her bag of candy bumping along the ground.

They met other little kids along the way, dressed as dinosaurs, Mickey Mouse, fairies, ghosts, zombies, zombie brides, Harry Potter, Pluto, a witch, and Dracula. All of them ran giggling like satyrs up the sidewalks shrieking the same familiar refrain, followed by their indulgent parents, who watched with bemused boredom and fondness. They goggled at Gold, and some of them snorted, as if they couldn't recall the last time the pawnbroker had done this—granted it had been quite awhile, but Alina was only eleven—so it hadn't been _that_ many years ago.

A few tried to stop him and ask why, but Gold just hurried off, using the excuse that he had to keep up with his niece and couldn't be bothered making small talk. He was sure the news of the accident would get around town by tomorrow morning.

Regina dragged him down another street, her little black Mary Jane's tapping out a staccato rhythm. She raced up to a brick house decorated with several pumpkins and rapped on the door. A bored-looking teenager answered the door with a tray full of candy. "Hey."

"Trick-or-treat, smell my feet, give me something good to eat!" Regina singsonged.

The boy smirked. "What if I don't?"

"If ya don't, I don't care," Regina replied, having learned this response from Hans and Henry. "I'll pull down your underwear!"

"Whoa! No way, kid!" the boy grinned. "Here, have some candy, little princess."

Regina giggled and took a Hershey bar.

"Regina, what do you say?" Gold prompted.

"Thanks!"

"Happy Halloween!" the kid called.

Soon they had walked out of the more affluent section of Storybrooke and towards the streets that bordered the docks and the less well-to-do sections of town. Here, Gold noticed, there were many older kids, dressed in scarier costumes, and they didn't seem too enamored of a small child in their midst.

One little snot, dressed like a werewolf, went and snarled at Regina, threatening to chomp her, and sent the little girl wailing back to where Gold waited at the end of a driveway. "Unca Rumple! That werewoof wanted to eat me!" sobbed Regina, throwing herself into his arms.

"It's okay, little imp! That's not a real werewolf, just a rotten little scamp," Rumple soothed, and glared angrily at the werewolf, who was snickering to his companions, a mummy and a pirate. He gestured, and the werewolf's pillowcase suddenly sported a hole, and as the kid ran to the next house, all his candy fell out and were snatched by other children coming behind him.

Regina gasped. "Unca Rumple! That mean werewoof lost all his candy!"

"That's what happens, dearie, when you're nasty to little princesses," Rumple said smugly, and then he led her to the next house.

Some of the houses had no one home and had left bowls of candy on their porches. Some of them had barely any candy left by the time Regina got to the bowl, and she grumpily took whatever was there, complaining softly to Rumple afterwards. "This house sucked! They only gots Warheads!"

"Hey, dearie. That's how it goes sometimes. Now mind your mouth, or else you'll eat soap instead of chocolate when we get back home," he scolded.

"Okay. Sorry," she apologized, then she ran up to the next house with a group of older kids.

Rumple figured he'd let her go through one more street before calling it quits, since it was getting onto dusk now and as night fell, he could feel the aura of dark magic grow stronger, as this was the night the veil between the living and the dead became thin and able to be crossed over. He watched as Regina came down the sidewalk, her little face pinched in a scowl.

"I got a Mars bar!" cried one little bee to another dressed like Bilbo Baggins.

"I got a Reeses!" the hobbit yelled.

"I got a KitKat," shrieked a skeleton.

"I got Skittles!" whooped a wizard.

"Unca Rumple, I got a rock!" Regina whined, showing him a white rock.

He stared at it, thinking, _what are they playing at here, the recreation of Charlie Brown?_ "Let me see that, dearie," he said, taking the rock from the scowling toddler and holding it in his hand for a moment. "Look, Regina. Now it's a pretty rock." He handed her back a chunk of iron pyrite, also known as "fools gold".

"Ooh! A sparkly treasure!" she grinned. "Thanks, Unca Rumple." She took the sparkly golden rock and put it inside her bag. "Now let's go down there!" she pointed to a long windy street with hardly any lights.

"All right, but I think this is the last street and then we ought to go home," Rumple said, feeling the wind pick up. "You want your jacket?"

"Uh . . . yeah. I'm cold," she said, and put it on. Then she slowly walked down the windy street, with Rumple following.

**Page~*~*~*~*~Break**

Further away, in the Storybrooke cemetery, crouched three children, two were twelve and one thirteen, around a Ouigi board on a slab of marble near the Mills family crypt. The board was illuminated by four candles, and the three children, Myra, her brother John, and his friend Frank, were seated in front of it.

"Okay, now how do we summon up a dead person again?" asked Frank, staring at the plastic pointer.

"It said we all have to join hands and concentrate," Myra instructed. "Think really hard about who we want to summon and he'll answer us. It's said that the door between the living and the dead swings wide on Halloween, so this should be a piece of cake."

Frank frowned. "Guys . . . are you sure we should be doing this?"

"What are you—chicken?" demanded John.

"No! But my dad always told me to be careful what you wished for . . . you just might get it."

"Well, so far we aren't getting anything," Myra snorted and then she grabbed her brother's hand. "Okay, now let's concentrate . . . who do we want to summon?"

"I know!" John cried. "We studied famous witch trials and stuff in school just this week. Let's see if we can summon up a witch!"

"No . . . a witch hunter!" Frank muttered.

"A witch hunter!" Myra nodded. "Yeah, let's do it! We'll summon up someone famous!"

"John, who's a famous witch hunter?" asked Frank.

"Uh . . .Matthew . . . err . . .Hopper . . . no . . . Hopkins . . . yeah, he killed like a bunch of people way back in the 1600's. Let's summon him up!" John yelled.

"Okay, now concentrate and say, Matthew Hopkins, I summon thee from beyond the grave," Myra ordered. "Matthew Hopkins, come to us and reveal your wisdom!" She held the two boys' hands and chanted that refrain three times.

Then they waited anxiously, staring at the Ouigi board.

"Nothing's happening," groaned Frank. "I think this thing's a fake."

"No, it isn't!" Myra snapped. "You're not trying hard enough! Again! And wish _hard_!"

They tried again, at her insistence.

When the pointer on the board didn't even quiver when they stared at it, Frank muttered, "I'm freezing and it's like a tomb out here. This is stupid. Let's get our candy and go home and watch Friday the Thirteenth on HBO."

"No way!" John cried. "It's a good thing I brought some insurance along," he said, and pulled out a dark vial of something.

"What's that, John?" asked his sister.

"Gorgon's blood."

Myra gasped. "John! That's Dad's . . . from when he went adventuring back in the old realm. He'll skin you if he knows you took it."

"So what? I'll use it to summon up this witch hunter dude and then I'll fill it back up with ink and he'll never know the difference," her brother sneered. "I toldja, Myra, we need an offering. No spirit comes for free."

"Yeah, John's right. All magic comes with a price," Frank said.

"Then here's the offering," John said, and dumped the Gorgon's blood out onto the Ouigi board.

Then they all joined hands again and began chanting, "Matthew Hopkins, we summon thee! Matthew Hopkins, we summon thee! By the dark of the moon and night's dark tomb, we summon thee!"

The Gorgon's blood smoked and steamed in the chill air and suddenly the temperature dropped like lightning. Frost rimed the Ouigi board and the candles guttered and flickered, then turned an eerie icy blue color.

"Something's . . . happening!" yelped Frank, squeezing Myra's hand hard.

The Ougi board pointer began to spin around like a top.

"Look at that!" Myra cheered. "We're doing it! Keep going!"

They chanted again and suddenly the Gorgon's blood was sucked into a glowing green hole, as something dark with glowing eyes of lambent fire emerged and stood before the trembling threesome.

Frank gulped. "Uh . . . guys . . .? Who's that?"

"It's . . . it's . . ." stammered Myra, horror stealing over her.

"The witch hunter," John hissed. "Matthew Hopkins."

The specter turned its terrible gaze upon them and spoke in a dark echoing tone, "Aye. I am Matthew Hopkins that was. What have ye summoned me for?"

"Uh . . . to . . .to . . ." stammered Myra.

"To hunt witches!" blurted Frank.

"Aye! Of course ye did!" laughed the specter. "Where be they?"

"Umm . . . over there!" John waved a hand towards the rest of Storybrooke.

The specter chuckled. "Cat got thy tongue, boy?"

"No, sir . . . just that . .. there aren't too many witches now . . ."

"Except Rumplestiltskin," Myra cried.

"He ain't a witch, he's a sorcerer," objected Frank.

"A warlock!" exclaimed the specter. "He'll do! Aye!" It sniffed the air, as if it were a hound.

The children watched in fascinated terror as the specter suddenly wailed and sprang into the air, streaking towards the boundary of the cemetery, searching for the warlock called Rumplestiltskin, spawn of the devil if ever there was one, to hunt him down and slay him.

**Page~*~*~*~*~Break**

"Unca Rumple, my feet hurt," Regina whined as she came down the steps of the latest house.

"Okay, dearie. Then why don't we head on home? It's getting late and I think you've got enough candy, don't you?" Rumple said, and he bent to pick her up.

They started walking down the street back towards Threadneedle Way, Regina clutching her sack of candy and hugging Rumple with one hand.

Suddenly there came a dreadful screeching, like a thousand cats being tortured.

Regina gasped and clung to Rumple for dear life. Shivering, she whimpered, "Unca Rumple, I's scared!"

Alarmed, Rumple looked around. His magical senses were going insane, screaming to him that something not of this world was walking the night. He lit up his hand with a pure white magelight, so he could see what was ahead of them.

At first all he could see was the sidewalk and the trees in neat rows along it, bent in the sudden gusts of chill wind that swept up from nowhere. Regina clung to him shivering and whimpering, for she too could sense the evil that stalked them.

Rumple sensed whatever it was coming closer, and he muttered something under his breath and concentrated, blinking them back to his house. On the porch, where Alina's carved jack-o-lanterns winked in the light of the magical candles, he set Regina down and opened the door. "Hurry, dearie, and get inside where it's warm."

Regina looked back at him. "What are you doin', Unca Rumple?"

"I need to take care of something first, dearie. Then I'll come right home. Now get inside, Regina." And he gently shooed her indoors, handing her the bag of candy as he did so.

He could feel the protections about his house guarding it from the evil thing that walked the streets of Storybrooke and he knew that his loved ones were safe from harm.

Resolutely he turned and walked down the stairs, going out to meet the dark thing that roamed the night and put an end to it . . . before it harmed one of the innocent children still trick-or-treating on this Halloween night.

"Rumple!" Belle called, standing on the porch. "What are you doing?"

He turned. "Taking care of business, dearie. I'll be home soon."

"What do you mean?"

"Someone's summoned up a . . . wraith or something," he called back. "And I need to go and send it back where it came from. Don't worry . . . I'll be all right."

"Be careful," Belle said.

"Always, dearie." He waved once before he disappeared into the rising mist that curled along the ground and twined about the trunks of the trees and the fenceposts surrounding the yards of the neighbors.

As he emerged from the eerie fog, he felt a dark presence surround him. He halted and waited.

A specter glowing a sickly green and white emerged from the air. "Warlock! I've found thee at last! An' now ye shall die, spawn of Satan! I am Matthew Hopkins, witch hunter! Be ye not afraid, warlock?"

Rumple looked up at the spirit of the man who had sent over 200 witches to their untimely deaths and bared his teeth. "We're all going to die someday, dearie. But the real question isn't whether or not I'm going to die . . . but whether or not I'm going to take you down with me. Bring it, witch hunter!"

As the specter drifted forward, Rumplestiltskin's hands began to glow with violet fire.


	6. Thou Shall Not Suffer A Witch To Live

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gold faces off against the spectral witch hunter!
> 
> And Regina gets into mischief with her Halloween candy.

Rumple knew the specter was newly summoned, though such an old one was plenty strong, especially on this night of all nights, the time when the old year died and the doors between the spirit world and the world of life were thinned and could be opened by anyone with the will and the right offering. He drew back his hand and sent a glowing violet ball of magical force at the specter, striking the undead apparition right in the chest.

Hopkins shrieked and clutched his chest, the magical energy fizzling and smoking upon his undead form. "Blast ye, warlock!"

Rumple raised an eyebrow. "Not used to that, are you?" he taunted, his hand now holding a fireball. "Not used to your 'prey' fighting back, are you, witch hunter? Though I'd wager half those you hunted and burnt at the stake were no more witches than they were evil. They were probably ordinary women who were called out by jealous neighbors and such, or those who were slightly different, with odd eyes or hair or who kept to themselves. Am I right? They had not the Gift, as I do, else you never would have caught them in the first place."

Hopkins seemed to shrink a little at Rumple's words. "How would thee know—warlock? Ye clearly are spawn of hell, wielding the forces of darkness like ye do!"

"Am I? How would you know that? Because I have magic?" Rumple challenged. "Magic is a force, nothing more. It's how you use it that determines light and dark."

Hopkins snorted, and attacked, using his lightning swift reflexes to strike at Rumple with a bony hand.

Rumple dodged, but the specter's hand caught his shoulder, and searing icy cold shot through him. He bit back a howl of pain, only the fact that he was partially immune to the effects of extreme cold as an Elemental Master prevented his entire arm from going numb. He flung the fireball at the specter, and called on the healing touch of the earth, which was anathema to undead, feeling the warmth of that element surge through him, banishing the unnatural cold.

The specter howled as the fireball struck it, for though it was a spirit, certain things, such as heat and light, could hurt it, and they did. Hopkins drifted away, hovering on the breeze, and cried, "And ye don't think what ye did was evil, warlock?"

"I'm defending myself, witch hunter!" Rumple returned. "You attacked _me_. All I was doing was minding my own business. I don't call that evil, I call that survival. What excuse do _you_ have?"

"Thou shall not suffer a witch to live!" Hopkins sputtered. "The Scriptures say so, hellspawn!"

"Oh? Scripture also says to do unto others as ye would have them do unto you," Rumple quoted. "Would _you_ want to be attacked for no reason? Who summoned you anyhow?"

Hopkins looked startled. "It . . . It were children . . . they called to me and I answered them . . . for their offering was sweet and I . . . I had not been away from . . . the void in so long . . . and they told me there were witches to hunt . . . Rumplestiltskin! What kind of heathen name is that?"

"It's not a name of this world," Rumple replied shortly. "For I am not a native of this realm."

"See? I was right! Ye are of the pit!" Hopkins cackled, and swept forward again, clawed hands reaching.

Rumple transported away, then hit the specter with another magical energy pulse, making it cry out again. "Calling me a demon doesn't make it so, dearie. Thought you'd have learned that by now."

Hopkins roared and attacked again, his form now tattered and wavering from Rumple's strikes. "Demon! I shall destroy ye!"

Again Rumple blocked the specter's clawed swipe. "Better than you have tried and failed, witch hunter. Why bother? What am I to you, you poor desperate soul?"

"Ye are an abomination against God and nature!" the specter bellowed.

Rumple rolled his eyes. "I've heard that before. From one as bigoted and stupid as you were in life. Shall I prove to you, Hopkins, that I am not the fiend you think I am?"

"How, warlock?" Hopkins laughed.

"Simple. I'll make a deal with you. If I can do something that will prove to you beyond doubt that I am not a dark warlock, you shall go back from whence you came, specter, and trouble me and those of this world no more. What say you? Have we got a deal?"

Hopkins hesitated. His hatred of those he considered witches was strong, almost as strong as it had been in life. Yet some of what Rumple had said struck home . . . because he had been punished for his zealotry and destruction of innocents by being sent into the void, where he had nothing to do save reflect upon his misdeeds, until he repented of them . . . a task which he found singularly difficult to do. He had leapt at the chance to come back into the world again, even if it were only for a short time, because he was so bored.

He detested the warlock before him, but he also considered himself better than the sorcerer before him, for he had never lost the arrogance he bore in life. And the unholy might of Halloween night was flowing through him, and he felt he could not be defeated, especially not by this hellspawned warlock. "Yes, warlock! If ye can prove ye're of the light—which I know ye aren't—I shall return to the void and trouble ye no more!"

"Then the deal is struck!" Rumple said, though he did not grasp the specter's bony hand to seal it. Instead he concentrated hard and whispered, "Powers that be, hear my request. Show this unbeliever, this lost soul, that I am what I say. By my Name and my Power, I abjure thee!"

Hopkins waited, hovering in the air, polluting it with his dark presence, spreading an aura of deadly cold about him, the cold of the grave, that sucked every bit of warmth from the living things around him.

Rumple wrapped his arms about himself and sought to endure the awful chilling cold while he waited for an answer to his request. He hoped the beings who dwelled in the light realms could hear his call even though the forces of darkness held sway upon the earth right then.

Hopkins started to chuckle, a hollow sound without any warmth or mirth in it, a mockery of true laughter. "T'would seem no one's answering yer prayer, warlock! So much for yer ability to show yerself a good person!"

"Wait. There's no set time for me to prove what I say," Rumple argued, feeling a bit desperate.

"True, but ye are a dark warlock and no amount of trickery shall convince me otherwise!" Hopkins hooted. "Admit it—ye're beaten, and cannot win against me!"

Rumple shook his head mutely, his fists clenching involuntarily. "Help me," he whispered. "Show this bragging blowhard the truth."

Minutes ticked by endlessly. Hopkins sneered at Rumple, his fiery eyes gleaming in maniacal triumph. "Admit it, warlock! I've won! Ye're nothing but a wicked devil and ye shall pay like all yer kind for yer unnatural practices!" The specter began to cackle, the sound full of terrible mockery and hopelessness.

Suddenly there came a sudden rush of warm air, as if summer had spawned there in the middle of the street. It banished the awful chill emanating from the specter and brought with it the zephyrs of the tropics.

Rumple felt the shift in the magical aura and then the great winged seraph appeared before him, its eyes glowing with that unearthly cobalt blue. It came and pressed against him, purring hard, for all the world like Nala when she wished to be petted.

Rumple reached out a hand and stroked the great avatar tentatively, his fingers tingling from the celestial warmth the seraph radiated.

Hopkins gasped in denial. "No! That . . . that is a heavenly messenger and guardian!"

"I know. And it is here by my request," Rumple pointed out.

The seraph turned and regarded the specter with icy eyes. Then it roared, and the sound caused the specter to shrink away in fear.

Shielding his face with a hand, Hopkins moaned. "This . . . ye are . . . what ye have said . . .for no such being would have come to ye otherwise . . ."

"Then I have kept our deal, Hopkins," Rumple intoned. "Now get thee gone and never return!" he made a flicking motion with his hand. "I, Rumplestiltskin Gold, banish thee, child of the void!"

A swirling vortex formed beneath Hopkin's feet and sucked the specter down into it.

As soon as the spirit had vanished, the seraph gave a soft purring growl and shook its great head.

"Thank you," Rumple said, and bowed to it.

The seraph nuzzled him once, then it too disappeared, melting back into the ether from where it had sprung.

Rumple felt a curious heat flow through him, and knew that somehow the seraph had blessed him.

He sighed and would have gone home then, but realized that he needed to find those responsible for summoning up Hopkins and make sure they couldn't summon up anything else. Concentrating, he followed the aura of the summoning spell back to its origin.

He found himself walking in the direction of the cemetery, and soon was crossing through the iron gates and towards the Mills crypt. The spell aura led him unerringly to a large marble slab and three youngsters huddled around it, dressed in jeans and hoodies, with scary masks resting beside them and a blackened Ouiga board and some candles burnt down to stubs surrounding it on the slab itself. The three kids looked scared out of their minds, around the same age as his daughter and grandson, two tow-headed siblings and one dark-haired boy, probably a friend of the blond boy.

Rumple's mouth tightened as he surveyed the children, he knew them, as he did everyone in Storybrooke. "Myra and John Hart and Frank Fletcher," he called as he appeared out of the thick fog that suddenly blanketed the ground. "What do you think you're doing, dearies?"

The three jumped about a foot, nearly levitating in their terror.

Myra screamed.

Frank whimpered.

John yelped, "Rumplestilskin!"

"You're . . . you're . . . alive . . ." Myra squeaked, quaking in her sneakers.

"I am, no thanks to you three," the sorcerer of Storybrooke said sternly. "What were you all playing at, summoning a spirit on this night of all nights? You could have killed someone, you foolish children!"

"Please, sir!" Frank cried, his eyes bugging half out of his head. "We . . . we didn't think it would work . . . at least I didn't . . . we didn't mean to hurt you . . . or anybody!"

Rumple crossed his arms over his chest, giving them a sharp Look that never failed to make those he directed it at quiver like an aspen in a high wind and repent of whatever misbehavior they had committed. "And just what did you expect would happen when you summoned up a centuries old witch hunter from beyond the grave? Maybe you thought to have a tea party with him, huh?" his voice was sharp with sarcasm.

The three children flinched and looked at their sneakers.

"It was . . . just something to do on Halloween, Mr. Gold," John managed to say after it was clear his sister and friend weren't going to speak up. "Like . . . telling scary stories and stuff . . ."

Rumple snorted. "You did more than that, boy, and well you know it." He pointed a finger towards the Ouiga board. "What did you offer that with hunter to come after me? Because I know you offered something, for all magic comes with a price."

Myra swallowed, then said timidly, "We . . . uh . . . offered him some . . . Gorgon's blood, Mr. Gold."

"Gorgon's blood . . . no wonder the bloody specter was so swift to answer . . . that's a deadly poison, and meat and drink to one so depraved . . . do you know what that man did when he was alive? How many innocents died because he labeled them witches and warlocks? Over 200 people he killed in the name of his so-called cause . . . 200 people who died writhing in agony in fire or drowned in barrels . . . nailed shut in coffins . . . their screams for mercy echoing down through eternity . . . and you three idiots decide it would be a good prank to summon up his shade?"

Now John and Myra looked horrified, and the boy whispered, "Mr. Gold . . . we didn't really think he'd answer, even with the blood . . .when . . . when he did . . . we didn't know what to do . . ."

"I know that, boy! That's why you should never play about with magic that way! You could have summoned up much worse than him . . . for tonight is when all boundaries are thinned, and monsters and demons lie in wait for unsuspecting silly children like you to call out to them . . .and then they devour your soul in payment for your stupidity. You're lucky he was all that answered! And lucky as well that I could banish him before he attacked some little kid and killed them thinking they were a witch."

"We're sorry, Mr. Gold!" Frank whimpered, looking at the pawnbroker as if he were the boogeyman.

"Yeah, we'll never do it again," babbled Myra, more scared of the sorcerer than she had been of the spirit of Matthew Hopkins . . . almost.

"That's right, you won't," Gold said coldly, then he pointed a finger and the Ouiga board was turned into ash, which drifted away upon the wind.

Frank almost wet himself right there. He shot the angry sorcerer a pleading glance. "Please, Mr. Gold! We promise we'll never do anything so dumb again. Just don't . . . turn us into rocks or something!"

"You'd give rocks a bad name," Rumple snorted.

"Don't tell my dad, sir!" Myra babbled. "He'll kill us both!"

"After what you nearly did, I'd not blame him, girl," Rumple growled. "Any child of mine who behaved so would be grounded until she was twenty-one and scrubbing my basement floor with a toothbrush!"

"Please, sir!" John begged. "We'll . . . make you a deal."

Frank nodded. "Yeah . . . we'll do whatever you want."

"We promise," Myra sniffled, tears starting from her blue eyes.

Rumple eyed them all with one of his famous Dark One glares, that could put fear into the heart of the most powerful king or make a dragon tremble. He tapped a foot against the ground, considering for several long moments. At last he said, "All right. I won't drag you home by your ears and tell your parents how irresponsible and utterly foolish you were . . . if you agree to abide by my punishment for your recklessness. Yes or no?"

"Are you . . . gonna magic us?" Frank trembled.

"Or . . . or change us into bugs?" John asked.

"Or beat us like rugs?" Myra sniveled.

"Answer the question, dearies."

Slowly, all three nodded, apparently the fear of parental retribution outweighed anything that Rumple might do to them.

"Aloud."

"Yes, sir," they chorused miserably.

"Very well. Your punishment is this. You're to come here everyday after school with a bucket of Oxy-Clean and Lysol and a scrub brush and clean every inch of this cemetery. You're going to scrub all these headstones until they look as squeaky clean as the day they were first commissioned, and weed all the graves and pick up all the trash thrown in here by your friends. And if anybody asks what you're doing, you tell them community service. That ought to keep you three out of trouble and remind you of your idiocy for a good long time."

"How . . . how long do we have to come here?" asked Frank.

"Until the job is done. And be warned, dearies, I'm going to come here and inspect it every day . . . and if I find you've been slacking, I'll make you do it over again . . . with twice the amount of dirt and grime on the headstones and crypts . . . until you do it properly. And I don't care if it takes you till next Christmas, am I clear?"

The three groaned.

"Or I could just march you home right now and speak to your parents and let you suffer their punishment. Your choice."

"No!" John shook his head rapidly. "I'll do it, Mr. Gold."

"Me too," added his sister.

"Me three," Frank said rapidly.

"Then the deal is struck. Be over here tomorrow after you finish your homework, say around four o'clock. I'll be here waiting. Don't be late. And don't even think about breaking your deal . . . or else you'll regret it forever. Now get your behinds home," he ordered.

The three jumped up and ran out of the cemetery like he'd lit them on fire.

Shaking his head, Gold transported himself home, hoping that Belle hadn't been driven crazy with worry during the time he'd been gone.

**Page~*~*~*~*~Break**

"Rumple!" Belle cried in relief when her husband came through the door. She rushed over to him and grabbed him in a bear hug, pressing him to her as if she could absorb him into her being. "Are you okay? Are you hurt?"

Rumple reveled in her touch, even as he felt as if she was squeezing the breath from his body. He hugged her back, stroking her hair and kissing her. "I'm okay, dearie. I made a deal with the ugly creature, and I won. I banished it back to the darkness it came from, and then I made sure those who summoned it never did anything so stupid again."

"Who summoned it?"

"Some kids playing with a Ouiga board. But they won't be doing anything so dumb again," Rumple replied. "There's nothing to worry about, Belle. Everything's going to be all right now."

She relaxed against him, sighing in relief. "Oh, Rumple! I was so afraid . . . that you'd be hurt . . . or killed . . . I almost called Emma . . . but then I thought she's so upset over her parents, she'd go out of her mind if she knew what you were doing, and so would Bae . . . so I just waited by the window and prayed . . ."

"I'm sorry I made you worry," he said softly. "But I was the only one who could handle that thing." He looked about then, realizing that someone wasn't there to greet him. "Where's Regina? Asleep?"

Belle shook her head. "No . . . I tried to get her to lie down after she came home, but she insisted she wasn't tired and she ran upstairs to play with Sofia. You know . . . I haven't seen her since. I was so worried about you that I . . . never checked on her."

"Let's do that now," Rumple said, starting up the stairs. "She's probably starving by now, it's almost seven o'clock. She hasn't eaten yet, has she?"

"No," Belle said guiltily. "I forgot all about supper, I was so worried. And she never came down to remind me."

"Hmm. I wonder why? Usually she's pestering one of us to eat by now," Rumple said, frowning.

He reached Regina's room. "Regina, dearie, are you awake?"

Hearing nothing, he pushed open the door. The light was on, but the little bed was empty, with only Sofia sitting upon it. On the ground were Regina's shoes and socks and her bag of trick-or-treat candy . . . which was half empty and wrappers from various chocolate bars and other candy were scattered about the floor.

"Oh no!" Belle groaned. "Rumple . . . no wonder she never came down to get something to eat. She . . . ate half her Halloween candy . . . even though I told her to wait till after supper. She . . . probably got sick and tired of waiting and snuck it up here."

Rumple nodded, for that was a typical thing for a toddler to do. "Yes, that's what it looks like. But where is she now, Belle?"

"I . . . don't know," Belle said, and then she started calling Regina's name.

They looked in the bathroom and down the hall in Rumple's study. No Regina. They looked in Alina's room, in the closet in the hall, and in their bedroom. The little girl was nowhere to be found.

"Rumple, where is she?" Belle cried, panicked. "I don't think she went out of the house, I locked everything after you brought her back, and she's too small to reach the locks."

"She has to be here, Belle. I think . . . she's hiding somewhere, probably afraid we're going to punish her for eating all that candy," Rumple surmised.

"You're right . . . but Rumple . . . if she ate all that . . . she probably has an awful stomachache," Belle said, shaking her head sadly. "This is all my fault! I should have kept a better eye on her."

"Hey, don't beat yourself up over this, dearie," Rumple consoled her. "It happens . . . even when you're keeping an eye on them, little kids find some way to get into mischief. The important thing is finding her."

After five more minutes of calling and searching, Belle finally found her hiding behind the sofa in the living room, curled up in her Snow White costume, chocolate stains all over it and her face and hands. "Regina, baby, why didn't you come out when we called you?" she asked softly, kneeling down as much as she could.

The little imp looked up at her and moaned pathetically. "Auntie Belle . . . I don't feel good."

Belle nodded knowingly. "Does your tummy hurt, sweetie?"

"Uh huh," the toddler sniffled. "It hurts real bad." Huge tears pooled in her eyes.

"That's because you ate too much candy," Belle said.

"I was hungry!" Regina said, then she clutched her stomach and started crying.

Belle felt terrible, and she looked over at Rumple. "The poor little thing!"

"Regina, dearie, come here," Rumple said, and gently nudged Belle aside. He lifted the little girl into his arms.

Regina squirmed in his embrace. "Oww! Unca Rumple . . ."

"I know, dearie. You've stuffed yourself like a Thanksgiving turkey and now your poor tummy hurts like blue blazes," he murmured, carrying her out from behind the sofa. He brought her over to the sofa and held her on his lap. The toddler cried and whined as he gently felt her stomach.

"Rumple, what should we do? I'd give her chamomile tea but . . ."

"That would be okay, but she's hurting pretty bad, and it'll take too long to work. Get me a spoon, please, and I'll get my bottle of cherry cordial." He snapped his fingers and a small vial of a deep red substance appeared in his hand. It was his own potion for upset stomachs, which he'd made for Belle.

Belle returned with a spoon and he said quietly, "Regina, I need you to take this."

"No-o! I don' wanna take yucky medicine!" she wailed.

"Sweetie, this doesn't taste bad," Belle said. "I've taken it."

"Dearie, I know your tummy hurts, and if you take this it'll stop," Rumple promised.

"You promise?" she whimpered.

"I do." He said, and then he poured her a spoonful. "Come on, imp. Open wide."

Normally, Regina fought taking medicine like the plague, but this time her stomach was cramping so much she just wanted it to stop, and so she obeyed and opened her mouth.

Rumple popped the spoon in and she swallowed. Belle was right, it tasted like cherries and wasn't disgusting at all.

"Again, dearie," Rumple said, and gave her another spoonful.

"Good job!" Belle said. "You're such a brave girl!" She looked at Rumple. "How long before it works?"

"About seven minutes," he answered, shifting the child so he could rub her back gently. Regina curled up into his chest.

After about five minutes, Regina looked up at Rumple and said, "My tummy don't hurt no more."

"Good. Next time don't eat half a bag of candy," he said. "How about you eat some soup now and then Auntie Belle can read you a story?"

"'Kay," she agreed and Belle went to heat up a can of chicken noodle soup.

Regina ate that and some crackers, plus a small cup of chamomile tea. Afterwards, she took off her costume and Belle said she would wash it, since Regina had noticed the chocolate all over it and got upset.

Three bedtime stories later, Regina was sleepy, and Belle sang to her after she tucked her into bed.

Rumple came in after Belle had sung her favorite lullaby, about all the pretty horses, holding Nala, who was in her costume, a delicate golden jeweled collar and golden hoop "earrings" which Rumple had fixed to her ears with a simple charm. "Look, Regina. Nala has her Halloween costume on. She's Bast, the Egyptian cat goddess. Do you remember when we went to Mahattan to the museum and you saw all those statues of her in the Egypt room?"

Regina smiled at the kitten. "Yeah, I 'member, Unca Rumple." She held out a hand to pet the black cat.

Gold knelt with Nala so she could stroke the little feline's head and Nala for once simply stayed and let Regina pet her, purring softly, her green eyes half-mast.

"Night, Nala! Happy Halloween!" Regina said, and kissed the kitten's nose.

"Okay, dearie. Time for bed," Rumple said, and released Nala, who went and sat in the middle of the floor.

Belle and Rumple sat with the toddler until she had fallen asleep, then they closed the door almost all the way and went to get all the food Belle, Alice, and Jill had prepared and put it in the basement for the party.

That done, they went and got into their costumes, and put the bowl of forfeits into the treat hand bowl to give to their guests as they came down the stairs, since this was an Underworld party, everyone who entered had to pay a forfeit, which they would pick out of the bowl.

Belle smiled appreciatively at Rumple, who was costumed as Hades, Lord of the Underworld, wearing his dragonscale leather pants and a long ebony tunic with gold flames on it, as well as a cloak that shimmered and glistened with different shifting jewel tones. He had a circlet of gold with a diamond in it on his head and his boots were tight dragonhide ones. An obsidian scepter was attached to his belt, which had a golden Greek key buckle on it. He looked mysterious, magical, and undeniably sexy. "You look incredible, Rumple."

"So do you, dearie," he said, eyeing her.

Belle was costumed as Persephone, his queen. She wore a long flowing gown of shifting deep blue and purple hue, and a girdle of golden links wrapped about her torso. On her feet were dainty golden sandals and her toenails were painted a vibrant purple, matching her gown. She also had on a small half-cloak of purple velvet and around her neck was a golden pomegranate necklace. Her circlet had six small rubies in it, representing the six pomegranate seeds she had eaten in the Underworld. Her hair was left loose and flowing, except for the scalloped golden combs on either side. Small ruby drops were in both ears and she had six golden bracelets on her right wrist that tinkled gently when she moved them. Her costume was loose enough to be comfortable, yet it accented her pregnancy. She looked regal and breathtakingly beautiful.

Rumple put a hand on her stomach, and whispered, "Your mama looks every inch a queen tonight, dearies." Then he grinned as he felt one of the twins kick.

Belle covered his hand with hers and said, "And your papa looks just like a god in those dragonscale leathers." She gave his bottom a playful smack and smirked. "I wonder what everyone else is wearing?"

"You mean Alice didn't tell you who she was going as?" Rumple asked.

"No, she wanted it to be a surprise," Belle said. "I guess we'll find out soon enough. It's almost ten o'clock."

Nala twined about Rumple's feet, meowing, until he went and petted her.

As he did so, the doorbell rang, as the first of their guests arrived.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so what do yu think everyone came as?


	7. All's Well That Ends Well

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the Halloween party at the gold house and a reunion with the Charmings

Afirst guests to arrive were Morticia and Gomez Addams, or Ruby and Victor. Gold had his animated skeletal butler open the door and croak, "Good evening! Welcome to the Underworld! Have a screaming good time."

Victor stared at the butler and cried, "My God, is that thing real?" before coming inside.

Ruby chuckled. "No, it only looks real, Gomez. I can tell," she smirked, tapping the butler with her hand. "Nice decoration though, Gold."

"Thank you, Morticia," Gold grinned. "I just used a bit of magic to animate him, but he's not a real skeleton."

"You had me going for a minute there, buddy," Victor chuckled. "Thought you'd raided the hospital medical lab for a moment. Nice job with those jack-o-lanterns, by the way. I like how they project into the air and move."

"That's Alina's specialty—pumpkin carving," Belle said, smiling at him.

"She did a great job," Ruby praised. "Now . . . let's get this party started."

"Right this way," Gold said, and led the way downstairs. He picked up the plastic cauldron on the table when they'd reached the bottom and gestured to it with a flourish. "Okay, here's how this works. Every guest has to pay a forfeit before they enter the Underworld, just like in the olden days, when they put coins on the eyes of the corpses to pay the ferryman."

"A forfeit?" Victor repeated. "Like money?"

"No, no," Belle laughed. "You have to pick a forfeit out of the cauldron and do what it says. It's silly, but it's fun."

Victor shrugged. "Okay, whatever," and he reached into the cauldron and pulled out a slip of paper. "Give your best imitation of Elmer Fudd."

Ruby started giggling. "Do it, Gomez," she urged, smoothing down her black dress, which was a bit racy. She also wore her hair piled on top of her head, and had three-inch spiked heels and her nails were onyx and long and tapered.

"Aww, come on. Gold, you're not serious!"

"That's Hades to you, and yes, dearie, I am," Gold teased.

Victor sighed. "Okay, here goes." Then he said, in a squeaky high voice, "Silly wabbit, Trix are for kids—whoops, wrong rabbit!"

Gold and Belle burst out laughing. So did Ruby.

"Do over!" Whale cried.

"You get brownie points, Whale," Belle snickered.

"Go ahead, dearie," Rumple chuckled.

Victor cleared his throat. "Be vewwy vewwy quiet! I'm hunting wabbits!" He put a finger to his lips. Then he burst out with, "Dr. Kilpatient! Dr. Kilpatient!" He pretended to sob hysterically. "Oh no! I'm a _wabbit!_ "

They all laughed and then Rumple clapped and said, gesturing behind him, "You're in, Gomez. Thanks for being a good sport. Your turn, Morticia."

Ruby rolled her eyes, then she reached into the cauldron and picked up a paper. She unfolded it and groaned. "I'm killing you, Gold!"

Victor turned and asked, "What's it say, babydoll?"

"It says . . . I have to sing Who's Afraid of the Big Bad Wolf!" she cried indignantly.

"Oh my God! _You_ got that?" Belle was cracking up.

"Gee, thanks, girlfriend!" Ruby scowled, than she started laughing. "Hope you've got earplugs, 'cause I'm no Katie Perry." Then she started singing, ending her debut with a soft howl.

Gold applauded and bowed. "Nice job, Ruby! Go ahead!"

She sauntered past him, and as she went by, she purred, "Man, Gold, you sure clean up pretty!" and pinched his bottom cheekily.

"Hey, dearie! Hands off the merchandise," Rumple chuckled.

Belle pretended to glare indignantly at her. "Watch it, Ruby! He's married, remember?"

She smirked. "Sorry, couldn't resist," before taking Victor by the arm and walking into the basement, which was decorated like a temple to the gods of the Underworld.

"Mmm! Those appetizers look delicious," said Victor. "You make 'em, Belle?"

"Me and Alice and Jill," Belle called back.

There were cocktail meatballs in a "blood" sauce, which was really chili sauce and cranberry jelly, chicken wings with balsamic vinegar glaze and some with buffalo sauce, a chicken parmesan mummy, "bloody fingers" which were pigs in a blanket with barbecue sauce, pumpkin soup, Halloween Jell-O, donut eyeballs, cookies, Yodel tombstones, buckeyes, skeleton finger pretzels, and Halloween cupcakes. There was blood punch, spiced cider, and an open bar for those who needed their alcohol fix.

In the background was Halloween tunes, like Michael Jackson's "Thriller", "They're Coming to Take Me Away", the theme song from "Nightmare on Elm Street", "The Addams Family", "Witch Doctor", and "Monster Mash".

Spider webs and black lights floated across the ceiling, and creepy shadows danced on the walls.

Next to arrive were Granny and Archie, and Granny was dressed as Ruth from the Pirates of Penzance, a sultry middle-aged pirate queen who smirked at Hades and Persephone as she came up to them.

"What's this forfeit business, Rumple?" she demanded.

"It's the cover price, dearie," he winked at her.

"Humph!" she snorted, then she picked one out of the cauldron. "Give your host a kiss," she read.

Archie covered his mouth with his hand. "Oh, boy! Does it say which host?"

"Belle!" Rumple hissed. "I thought we'd taken that one out."

"Uh . . . I guess we forgot, dealing with Regina and all," she said, blushing.

Granny rolled her eyes. "Figures." She eyed them both speculatively. Then she sighed and said, "Pucker up, Gold!" and landed a smacking kiss on his mouth, chuckling wickedly at the sorcerer's surprised expression. "Ha! Didn't think I'd do it, did you, laddie?"

"With you, one never knows, fair lady," Rumple said, and waved her through.

"Okay, Mr. Wolfman," Belle cried gaily, and gestured for Archie to pick out a forfeit.

He rubbed his hands together and pulled out a piece of paper. "Uh . . . you look like a monkey," he read. "Can you act like one too?"

"Go for it, Hopper!" hooted Jefferson, who had appeared with Alice right behind the psychiatrist.

Blushing slightly, Archie began making monkey sounds and scratching himself.

"Got fleas, buddy?" Alice snickered, and they all were hysterical for about a minute.

"I can't wait to see what _you_ pick!" the Wolfman shook his finger at her.

"Well, at least I'm not a monkey's uncle, sugar!" she said outrageously.

Belle curtseyed to her and grinned. "Why, Scarlett, how nice of you to come to my little party!"

"Fiddle-dee-dee, Mellie!" Alice simpered, curtseying back to her in Scarlett's famous green dress made from the drapes at Tara. "I wouldn't miss it!" She wore a black wig over her golden locks and looked stunningly like the famous Southern belle. She winked outrageously at Rumple. "Oh, Ashley . . . you look simply dashing in your evening attire!" She put a hand to her heart. "You fair take my breath away!" She fluttered her lashes at him provocatively.

Rumple bowed to her and said, "The pleasure's all mine, Miss O'Hara. Or is it Butler now?"

"As God is my witness . . . I married Rhett on Sunday," Alice declared. "To pay the taxes on Tara." She smirked at her husband. "Right, Rhett?"

Jefferson, dressed as Rhett Butler, sketched them a bow and drawled in his best Southern accent, "Frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn why you married me . . . as long as we're married, Scarlett darling!" And he gave his wife a playful swat, laughing.

Alice pretended to glare at him. "You, sir, are no gentleman!"

Jeff smirked. "And you are no lady!" he returned.

She tossed her head at him. "I wish the damn Yankess had shot you!"

Grinning, Jeff pulled her into an embrace and kissed her.

When they broke apart, both were rather breathless and laughing.

"Good thing they never filmed that kiss on screen!" Belle said, her blue eyes dancing. "They'd have had to rate it R then."

Alice rolled her eyes and said, "Now we just need Aunt Pitty and her smelling salts."

"Pick a forfeit, dearie," Rumple said, and held out the cauldron to her.

"Okay, sugar!" Alice reached into the cauldron. "Ooh, let's see! And the survey says . . . tell a secret you've never told before. You sure you want to know, Belle?"

"Come on, Alice. Tell!" Belle was snickering slightly.

"Okay . . .I'm secretly lusting after Whale and want to bear his love child!" Then she cracked up. "You can see all the sordid details on Oprah!"

"That's your secret?" Belle pretended to be insulted.

"You never said it had to be a real one, sugar," her friend pointed out. "Hurry up and pick one, Rhett. I'm starving!"

"Hold on, Scarlett." He rubbed his hands together. "Lady Luck, don't fail me now." Then he reached into the cauldron. "Hmm . . . answer a riddle given by your hosts. Go ahead, ask away."

"Do you want to or should I?" Belle queried.

"Have fun, dearie," Gold sniggered.

"Good thing I had one or two prepared ahead of time," Belle said. "Listen up, Rhett. Why is a raven like a writing desk?"

Jefferson goggled at her. "That's your riddle? Do I get three guesses?"

"Just answer the question, dearie. _If_ you can," Rumple challenged.

"Uh . . ." Jeff deliberated. "Because . . . they make your head spin around? I don't know. Am I supposed to?"

Belle chuckled. "You know . . . the Mad Hatter in Carroll's book never knew the answer either."

"Do you know it?" Jeff challenged.

"Of course I do . . . or rather I know what Carroll said it was," Belle replied. "He said . . .because they can produce a few notes, though very flat, and it is nevar put with the wrong end in front."

"I won't ask _how_ you know that," laughed the portal jumper. "Does this mean I have to gatecrash the party?"

"Hardly. You had to try and answer the riddle, which you did," Rumple replied. "Welcome to my humble abode, Mr. Butler."

"Charmed, sir," Jeff gave him a saucy wink, then he sashayed into the room with Scarlett.

Bae and Emma were the last to arrive, as it took Bae that long to convince Emma to go to the party. They showed up costumed as Mars and Bellona, the Roman god and goddess of war, both wearing the signature red Roman tunic, gold half-cloaks, gilded boots and armed with Roman gladius' and pilas and wearing fake Roman breastplates. Emma had braided her hair into a crown and wore it wrapped around her head, and Bae had gone totally clean-shaven, with his hair barbered in neat Roman military fashion.

Rumple and Belle hugged both of them, and Rumple said to Emma, "How are you holding up, Emma?"

"I've been better," the sheriff allowed. "But Bae's right. It's doing me no good to sit there brooding and worrying. They wouldn't want that, I know they wouldn't. So . . . here I am, Rumple. Do I look awful?"

"You look stunning, dearie," he reassured her. "I'm sure they're going to be fine. You can go on in, you don't have to play our little forfeit game."

"What forfeit game, Papa?" asked Bae curiously.

"The one where you pick a forfeit out of the cauldron and do what it says before you get to enter my temple," Hades answered.

"Everyone here's done it?" asked Emma.

"They sure have . . . and it was so funny . . ." Belle told her some of what they others had to do.

"I'll go first," Bae volunteered and then he picked a paper. "Sing a popular kid's TV commercial. Oh, hell! I don't believe this. Can I pick something else?"

"No, dearie. Them's the breaks," Rumple said, his eyes twinkling wickedly. "Let's hear it, Baelfire."

"Papa, you asked for it," Bae warned, then he drew in a deep breath and said, "Friends, Romans, countrymen, lend me your ears . . . and forgive me for making you wish you were deaf." Then he started to sing, "My bologna has a first name, it's O-S-C-A-R . . ."

Before he was halfway through the popular jingle Emma was doubled over, giggling like she'd inhaled laughing gas. "Oh . . . damn . . . I can't believe I forgot my phone!"

Bae rolled his eyes. "Thanks a lot!" Then he continued gamely, "Cause Oscar Meyer has a way with B-O-L . . . uh how the hell do you spell bologna?"

"Rumple! Where did this boy go to school?" Belle demanded, then she totally lost it.

"He takes after his mother," Rumple answered, and then they all started laughing.

"I cannot believe I just did that," Bae said, shaking his head. "That was just awful!"

"I recorded it on my phone," Rumple said with a wicked smirk.

"Papa! No!"

"And it's going on youtube," he cackled.

"That's it! I'm officially killing myself," his son cried.

"Really, dearie?" Rumple demanded. Then he clapped Bae on the back. "Good form, my boy. Emma, you want to try?"

"Sure," Emma said, thinking it might help her to forget seeing her parents lying in those hospital beds. "Why not?" Then she stirred the pieces of paper and snatched one up. She read it and then tossed her head from side to side and drawled, "Like, oh my _Gawd,_ Mars, did you _see_ what Hades is wearing? Can you believe how gnarly he looks in those totally bitchin' leather pants? Like I want you to get some, dude! Like right now!"

Bae stared at her, then he started laughing uncontrollably. "Like, okay, Bellona babe! You got some spares lying around, Papa?"

Rumple and Belle were hysterical too.

When they finally regained control over themselves, Belle said, "You win the door prize, Emma. And you nearly made me wet myself."

"You're not the only one, dearie," her husband admitted, and then he handed Emma a gift card to a local restaurant. "When you want to go eat, just let us know and we'll watch Henry." Then he winked at his son. "Still want those pants, Bae?"

Bae smirked. "Hell, yeah. Hey, Mikey, she likes 'em."

They followed Rumple and Belle into the room, and happily mingled with their friends till past midnight, eating, drinking, and dancing to the disco and pop music Gold played on his Bose.

They all played some more fun games, like bobbing for apples and pin the head on the Headless Horseman and darts, where they threw darts at Captain Hook's picture.

"It's too bad about Mary Margaret and David," Archie remarked to Ruby as they ate some appetizers.

"Yeah, but at least they'll be okay eventually," she said, munching on a hot wing.

"And that's the most important thing," Emma reminded her, eating some meatballs. She was still worried about her parents, but coming here had released a lot of the tension she'd been feeling and she felt better now than she had earlier. They would get through this . . . just as they had everything else, she reminded herself, then she went to get a Yodel tombstone from the buffet table.

The Halloween party was a smashing success, and everyone agreed they'd have to do it again next year . . . and maybe by then David and Snow could help organize a kid's Halloween parade too.

Everyone went home with leftovers and a small bottle of Wicked Ale as a favor. Belle and Rumple were so tired afterwards that they only had energy to get undressed before they were asleep, and they slept until past eight the next morning, only waking up when Regina barreled into their room, yelling, "Wake up, Auntie Belle and Unca Rumple! It's morning time!"

Groaning, Rumple turned over and buried his face in his pillow. "Regina, go back to sleep."

"But I's not tired, Unca Rumple," she stated, and then she jumped right on his back.

He grunted sharply and half-growled, "Regina, get off me! I'm not a rocking horse."

"Unca Rumple, I'm hungry!" she cried. "An' I wanna see Mommy and Daddy!"

He sighed and said, "All right, but you go get dressed and then we'll go visit them, dearie."

"Yippee!" she shrieked in his ear, and then she jumped off him and raced from the room.

He turned his head and looked at Belle, who was also awake now. "Whoever said thank heaven for little girls never met Regina," he muttered, then he kissed his wife.

**Page~*~*~*~*~Break**

Snow and David were awake and eating breakfast with Bae and Emma when Gold, Belle, and Regina arrived at their hospital room.

Regina immediately climbed on their beds and hugged and kissed them with such exuberance she nearly pulled the IV's from their arms. "Mommy! Daddy! You missed Halloween while you was sleepin'!"

"I know, sweetie," Snow said, giving her enthusiastic daughter a smile. "Did you have a good time trick-or-treating with Uncle Rumple?"

"Uh huh. But next Halloween I wanna go with you and Daddy," Regina stated.

"Then next year we will," David promised, grinning at her.

"When you comin' home?" Regina asked.

"As soon as Dr. Whale runs some more tests," said her father. "If everything is fine, we'll be coming home today. I wonder where he is? I think he's late this morning."

"That's probably my fault," Rumple said ruefully. "He was at my Halloween party last night."

"Darn! And we missed it," David sighed. "Oh well. There's always next year. And at least we'll all have Thanksgiving together."

"That we will, dearie," Rumple agreed.

"Where are we having it?" asked Snow.

"My house," Belle answered. "It's the only one big enough."

"True," Snow agreed. "But we can discuss that later. Right now I want to hear about that Halloween party. From what Emma tells me, it was a scream . . ."

"You have _no_ idea," Belle remarked, her blue eyes twinkling, thinking that if this was what Halloween was like, there was no telling how Thanksgiving would go. But one thing was sure, it would be a holiday to remember.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: So . . . who knows what Emma's forfeit was? And who can't wait to see Thanksgiving with the Golds/Charmings? If you want any of my recipes for the Halloween treats, just ask! Thanks so much for reading and reviewing, dearies

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks to everyone who requested more of this family! Please note, in this AU Rumple was never in love with Cora or had any kind of affair with her, he was just her teacher in magic.


End file.
